by Max Barry

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by The Holy Frozen Purple Empire of Glacikaldr. . 92 reads.

Unicorn Jousting - Rejectmas Festival 2019


As a part of [url=]Rejectmas Festival 2019[/url], we ran a Unicorn Jousting tournament with poll-run playoffs! Congratulations to [nation]The Church of Satan[/nation] whose sponsees came out on top, securing the title of UNICORN JOUSTER of 2019!


[list=1][*](Eliminated in the Quarterfinals) [nation]The Pharcyde[/nation]'s Unicorn Boris Nikolayevich Kuznetsov (Russian: Борис Николаевич Кузнецов) and Joust The Dark Knight:
[*](UNICORN JOUSTER of 2019) [nation]The Church of Satan[/nation]'s Unicorn Rudolphon the Reindragon and Joust Duke Christmas Goodknight:
[*](Eliminated in the Semifinals) [nation]Dead I Jack[/nation]'s Unicorn The Silver Steed and Joust "Deadeye" Jack:
[*](Advanced to the Final) [nation]A Leaf on the Wind[/nation]'s Unicorn Candy Carpetburn AKA "The Rib Cruncher" with no joust (declared self-ridden 'free spirit'):
[*](Eliminated in the Quarterfinals) [nation]Toerana[/nation]'s Unicorn Wardrobious and Joust Stephen:
[*](Eliminated in the Quarterfinals) [nation]Outboundstagnate[/nation]'s Unicorn Borbib with no joust (allegedly, "He is all-powerful and predates the universe"):
[*](Eliminated in the Quarterfinals) [nation]Glacikaldr[/nation]'s Unicorn Ruthien and Joust Dame Sylair Nivali
[*](Eliminated in the Semifinals) [nation]Jodi Samsinak[/nation]'s Unicorn TLJ best starwars movie and Joust Penelope (Prequels-are-Good) Yoda[/list]


[box][size=120][b]The One Rule:[/b][/size]

These will be popularity contests with only one rule: one vote per person.

If you break this rule, you will be DISQUALIFIED. 

Of course, you can't help it if other people vote with more than one nation on your behalf, but if [nation=noflag]Glacikaldr[/nation] receives a REPORT WITH EVIDENCE via a telegram that shows that you have been trying to coerce more than one vote from other people, then you will also be disqualified.

So, cheat carefully and with only people that you can trust! If both jousts are caught cheating, then only the cheating jouster who cheated the most will be disqualified.[/box]

The first EIGHT Reject contestants to register will be in the running to be declared [b]UNICORN JOUSTER of 2019[/b]!


Jousts are encouraged to create a dispatch about their unicorn or jousting career as well, to help them win over votes during their match-ups.

For example, here is a summary for Glacikaldr's unicorn, Ruthien:

[box][floatright][img][/img][/floatright][size=120][b]The [strike]Donkey[/strike] Unicorn:[/b][/size]

With sponsorship from House Nivali, the Glacikaldrian [strike]Donkey[/strike] Unicorn, Ruthien, was accepted into the [strike]Royal Ass Côte Races[/strike] Unicorn Jousting of Rejectmas Festival 2019 for its agility, speed, versatility and strength. 

Ruthien is kept alive thanks to the technological advances delivered by Artificial Intelligence. Can you believe that there was once a time where donkeys couldn't be perpetually kept alive?

[size=120][b]Jousting Career:[/b][/size]

When joined by his joust, the young and dashing Dame Sylair Nivali, Ruthien remains unmatched by any Glacikaldrian equivalent. 

Notably, Ruthien is also the esteemed winner of the [url=]Royal Ass Côte 2018[/url].

[url=]Please enjoy this leftover goodie bag celebrating his victory (not a bribe)![/url][/box]


To register your nation among the first eight contestants, please nominate your unicorn and joust via the following telegram form to [nation=noflag]Glacikaldr[/nation]:

[box]To Whom It May Concern:

We, [nation], wish to nominate a contestant for the Unicorn Jousting of Rejectmas Festival 2019.

Name of Unicorn: [insert]

Name of Joust (conventionally a Knight or Dame): [insert]

We understand the one rule and agree to its terms and the terms of Rejectmas Festival 2019. We understand that any damages to both unicorn and joust, without exception to the lawful duty of care within [region]the Rejected Realms[/region], is not to be held against the respondent in any court of law and civil dispute. We would also like to thank you for one of Ruthien's leftover goodie bags.

We wish you a hairy and very smooth Rejectmas. Yours in Rejection,

[nation's regional ambassador][/box]

Please fill in the sections in closed brackets and return the nomination form at your earliest convenience if intending to apply.


Please be aware that polls will be run for periods of 24 hours once the tournament begins, and will be open to all nations within the confines of the one rule. Participant nations will be notified when they are featured in a match-up via a telegram.

Please find below an outline of the tournament's playoffs: