by Max Barry

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by The Protectorate of South Pacific Information Center. . 87 reads.

N-Day 4


Displaying great leadership in the field by their willingness to completely abandon their larger, stronger, more successful, more honorable, better organized, and far-less irradiated faction to come to the aid of Bikini Bottom in their time of need and lead* them to victory*
*victory here being defined loosely
*lead here being defined loosely

The lepearchauns

Upon learning of the The Great Betrayal, lep issued a grave blood oath to restore the faction's tarnished honor, even should he perish in the process -- indeed, especially if he should perish in the process.
'twas by his own hand the foul menace was finally laid to rest.

Holly United

Though already owing allegiance to multiple factions and embroiled in wars on numerous fronts, they yet managed to carve out precious time, which they already could not afford to spare, in order to keep a watchful eye on the humble faction of Bikini Bottom and fight beneath its noble Turquoise Banner.


Upon hearing the call to arms, showed laudable resolve and force of will, overcoming their naturally slothful nature and dedicating themselves fully to the cause of the faction, sacrificing sleep, health and all good sense in their single-minded pursuance of seeing Bikini Bottom emerge victorious in its struggles.


Though detained from the initial actions, they showed great perseverance in their determination to join the good fight, and when their time finally came, marched headlong into the fray, laughing in face of hundreds of nuclear missiles that rained down upon their head, ultimately meeting their death in glorious battle and dying honorably for Bikini Bottom.

Bria Wores Bobba

So keen were they to fight for their faction, it was from them that the first shots of The War were fired. Paying no heed that their actions might embroil Bikini Bottom in two simultaneous wars -- and deaf to history's lessons that a war on two fronts was folly -- they discarded good sense and whetted the faction's blade in battle.


Displaying outright willingness to send scores of panthers into the meat grinder with little or no regard for their safety, almost as though not caring one way or another whether they survived the battle. To a cat, they fell on the field.


Gleefully assuming the mantle of Archvillain in the grand narrative -- a role performed with great guile and much aplomb -- Densaner allowed himself to join a despicably-named and foully-reputed faction and thus embodied the "casus belli" of The War, acting as the focal point against which our faction might rally.

This wonderful dispatch was created by Panther.