by Max Barry

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by The Crowned Republic of Kabzeel. . 133 reads.




Crowned Republic of Kabzeel

Свобода через силу,—сила через ценности,—ценности через семью


Кабзил Империя



Coat of Arms

"Свобода через силу,
сила через ценности,
ценности через семью"
"Freedom through strength,
strength through values,
values ​​through family"

Anthem: Link"надежда"

Kabzeel (red)


and largest city


Official Language
and national language



58% Jewish
30% Christian
9% Muslim
3% Unaffiliated


Federal, Dominant-party
Socialist Constitutional


Kanina Paskhina-Halevi


Ekaterina Syukoseva

Prime Minister:

Christov Rozhkovo


National Parliament


• Unification

• Westward Expansion

• Conquering of Balkans & Greece

• Incorporation of Balkans & Greece

• Feminine Revolution

• Land gains after WWI

• Land gains after WWII

16 July 845





20 November 1875








Royal Token

The Crowned Republic of Kabzeel, or the Kabzeel Empire, is a transcontinental country in Eastern Europe and Western Asia. Kabzeel is bordered by Italy to the west, the Soviet Union to the east, Germany to the north, and Turkey to the south. As of 2019, the population of Kabzeel was listed at around 223 million people with about 72% living in the west and about 79% being predominately made-up of women. Kabzeel's capital, Belcross, is one of the largest cities in the world and the third largest in Europe. Other major cities include Jekabzeel, Baal' Khatsor, Kadesh Varni, and Qustantina (or Constantinople/Istanbul).

Kabzeel is a federal, dominant-party, socialist constitutional monarchy. The current monarch, Kanina Paskhina-Halevi, has ruled ceremonially since 2017 while the current President, Ekaterina Syukoseva, and Prime Minister, Christov Rozhkovo, run the daily governance of Kabzeel as the country's executive and legislative heads.

Kabzeel is a developed country and is the world's 7th largest economy by nominal GDP and 12th largest economy by purchasing power parity. It has a high-income economy and has a very high Human Development Index rating, ranking 9th in the world (.932). It first became industrialized in the early 20th century prior to the second world war after a massive series of economic reform, heavy nationalization efforts, and greater political centralization in the between the late 1910s and early 1930s.


The name Kabzeel is derived from the hebrew verb "קבץ" (qabas), meaning to gather or assemble, and the noun "אל" ('el), meaning God, together they mean "God's Gathering". Today, the name is used to reference the country's heritage as the largest predominately Jewish country in the world.


Kabzeel was first established in 845 CE during the early medieval ages along the Volga river as they were founded by Jewish traders and farmers who were often pillaged by raiding nations as well as the vikings. By the start of the 10th century CE Kabzeel would begin to expand westward while simultaneously spreading Judaism to most of Eastern Europe and becoming a major power in Europe - specifically against the Byzantine Empire, who lost the Balkan and parts of Greece areas during Kabzeel's conquests. However, by 1460, their battle against the Ottomans would end up lasting centuries until the dissolving of the Ottoman Empire in 1923 after WWI.

Law Enforcement

Anti-social behaviours are punishable by jail sentences and/or punitive fines, depending on the seriousness of the infraction. These behaviours, defined loosely as those "which violate standards of morality and show flagrant disrespect for public order and the collective good", include: public nudity, vandalism, possession of pornography, use of profanity in public, recreational drug use, and membership in anti-social subcultures, among many other things.

Crimes penalized by lengthy prison sentences tend to be more serious, such as drug dealing and violence against innocent citizens. Capital punishment is reserved for only the worst crimes: murder, rape, and high treason.

Rights Guaranteed by the Government

> Freedom from slavery and exploitative working conditions
> Freedom of speech (excluding explicit speech and speech intended to incite violence)
> Freedom of ideology
> Freedom of religion
> Right to a fair trial
> Right to education, health care, and housing
> Right to personal property
> Right to privacy while inside one's own residence - police must have a warrant to conduct surveillance.
> Right to vote, for those over 18 without criminal records

Other Rights

Ownership of hunting rifles is legal for citizens. However, individuals who commit a crime of any nature immediately forfeit their right to own a gun.

Production and/or consumption of alcohol is completely illegal.

Production and/or consumption of cannabis is prohibited without the written permission of one's doctor.

Divorce is prohibited in an attempt to maintain the sanctity of marriage. In order to apply for a marriage license, citizens are required to be at least 21 years of age and have gone through the proper educational material required by each person.

Adultery is prohibited by law for those in registered marriages in order to maintain the sanctity of a healthy relationship. The penalty is a $1000 fine or mandatory couples therapy.


Foreigners often describe Kabzeelians as some of the most polite, helpful, and generous people they've ever encountered. Common courtesy and "comradely politeness" are considered extremely important; Kabzeelians generally believe in the idea of treating all others with kindness and respect, even if it's someone they dislike.

Some aspects of Kabzeelian etiquette may seem overly formal to foreigners, such as the near-ubiquitous use of surnames and the emphasis on using good manners. Many tourists dislike being addressed as Mr. or Ms., but Kabzeelians often feel as if they're being incredibly rude when addressing a casual acquaintance by first name. Foreigners also note an adversity to jumping into intimacy too quickly--Kabzeelians need to take their time getting to know someone, especially on a romantic level.

An interesting abnormality about Kabzeelians is their tendency to get into deep conversations. Philosophy and politics are both common topics for a casual chat. Unlike in some other cultures, Kabzeelians rarely come out of political debates with hurt feelings, simply because of their unwavering politeness. Says one tourist, "Honestly, a Kabzeelian could insult me to my face and I'd just take it, because she worded it in such a courteous way."

Kabzeelian traditional woman


When meeting someone for the first time, Kabzeelians will usually shake hands. At subsequent meetings, cheek kissing is common as a "royal fraternal kiss" is exchanged among fellow socialists, and two kiss on the cheeks are exchanged among pretty much anyone else. That said, Kabzeelians don't usually mind if someone expresses discomfort with kisses, and will continue to greet them with a handshake or a hug instead.


Kabzeelian fashion is modest and practical above all else, due to the nation's conservative history and its staunch opposition of the sexual objectification of women in society. Government-sanctioned magazines promote fashion and beauty as necessary parts of a Kabzeelian man and woman’s life. Fashionable and beautiful clothes are seen as a signal of culture and quality of life equal (or superior) to that under more liberal countries.


In Kabzeel the family unit is one of the most important values for all Kabzeelians. The government promotes the idea of socialist family values while abolishing the thought of the nuclear family as an old, outdated reactionary belief used to pull women down and have them remain below the men of society. Families also tend to be quite large -- the average parent has three children, though it is not uncommon to come across Kabzeelians with more than five siblings. Three-generation households are typical, especially in more rural areas where larger homes are available. In more urban areas, often an extended family will share a cluster of neighboring apartments.

Marriage is taken very seriously. Divorce and adultery are socially frowned upon; Kabzeelians view them as devaluing what is supposed to be a very permanent and meaningful bond. However, in Kabzeel the only way to obtain a divorce is whether or not the relationship is either abusive or fraudulent. There is great stigma against premarital sex and especially premarital pregnancy, which is why the government aims to teach and warn young boys and girls the dangers of sex so they may choose more intelligent choices for their lives.


Kabzeel is a fully-functioning state-planned market economy. The state has a monopoly over the most essential industries, such as health care, education, and infrastructure, while private citizens are free to open businesses in other industries, to a point. The nation strives to be economically self-sufficient but often engages in trade with friendly regimes while defending the principles of globalization and free trade. Free, high-quality public education is offered from primary school to university. Healthcare is free at the point of use, paid for by taxes. Hospitals will never turn away patients as healthcare is viewed as a human right by the Kabzeelian government.

Working in Kabzeel

Kabzeel has a four-day work week. Most people work or attend school Monday through Thursday. In lines of work which require someone on the job daily, such as the police, schedules are staggered in such a way that 80% of the workforce is there each day.

Typical workdays are only about 8 hours long. The short workday and work week ensure that the workers have the time needed to care for themselves and their families as it is consider to be apart of the Kabzeelian Dream.

All state-owned workplaces offer free lunch for their workers in some capacity. Workplaces outside of the city (such as factories and collective farms) usually have a dining hall of their own where meals are served, whereas most workplaces in the city will provide their workers with free meal passes for a public cafeteria within walking distance.



Lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) people in Kabzeel face legal and social challenges not experienced by non-LGBT persons. Although same-sex sexual activity between consenting adults in private was decriminalized in 2003, homosexuality is disapproved of by most Kabzeelians, and same-sex couples and households headed by same-sex couples are ineligible for the legal protections available to opposite-sex couples. There are currently no laws prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation in Kabzeel. Transgender people are allowed to change their legal gender following sex reassignment surgery, however, there are currently no laws prohibiting discrimination based on gender identity or expression and recent laws could discriminate against transgender residents. Homosexuality was declassified as a mental illness in 2008 and although gays and lesbians are legally allowed to serve openly in the military, there is a de facto "Don't ask, don't tell" policy - though it has always been a standard practice by Kabzeelians in the military to have no sexual relations in general.


About 97% of Kabzeelians consider themselves to be religious, practicing or non-practicing, with around 58% of people identifying as either Jewish or 30% as Eastern Orthodox. Only around 9% of people identified as Muslim while only 3% of people were either unaffiliated or agnostic according to data from 2015.


Immigration to Kabzeel is an entry process of foreign citizens for permanent residence in the territory of the Crowned Republic. The standard immigration procedure consists of the following steps: obtaining a temporary residence permit; obtaining a permanent residence permit and obtaining Kabzeelian citizenship. Under current law, the citizenship of Kabzeel can be received after five years of residence and after passing an exam in Kabzeelian language.

Kabzeel maintains one of the world's most liberal immigration policies; anyone who works in Kabzeel for five years and develops fluency in the Kabzeelian language can become a citizen, provided he or she has not committed a crime. Almost anyone who is hired by a Russian firm can stay in the country and work indefinitely.

The large immigrant populations arriving in response to this liberal policy have sometimes been met with xenophobia. To counter this, the Kabzeelian state has shut down various anti-immigrant group pursuant to Kabzeelian hate speech laws, such as the Movement Against Illegal Immigration.