by Max Barry

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by The United States of Barry Goldwater The Ghost. . 66 reads.

Why I Chose the FCN

As you all know, I am a furry-in-denial who experiences extreme mood swings. One moment, I am dressed in a dog suit and behaving like a canine and the next moment I'm burning down a national park to rid the world of the animal/anime menace.

Luckily, the FCN (Furries of the Hotel CaliforNia) has helped with this. They supply me with illegal nuance pills everyday and as a result, I have reached a stage of calm and tranquility.

Before joining the FCN, I was a member of the USSR (UwU OwO Senpai Salt Republic), which encouraged my destructive behavior, leading me to commit 666 violent crimes in the State of Sweet Home Alabama from 2015 to 2018. Luckily, Otto von Bis(Karl)Marcks saved me, after which I shipped him with some dude named Qin Shi Huang (I think he's from Tuvalu idk).

So that's why you should join the FCN!

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