by Max Barry

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by The Duct Taped Together Lands of Broader Confederate States. . 517 reads.

The "person" behind libertarian Dixie (and why I made it that way)

Confederate States of America
Blind Follower

A. Jefferson

nope not yet, have a drawing instead

Imaginator of Dixieland


– Blind Hick (Formal)
– Blight upon Society (In-Formal)


2001 – Present (17 years)


August, '01


08-00-01 (age 17)


Wait. That's illegal.


See above.

Full Name

April Jefferson




Not going that far


In your dreams


San Jacinto High School
(graduated in 2020)




Military Service


Not yet

Service Branch


Years of Service

2020s at least


Senior Major General

April Jefferson (born ca. August, 2001)... nah, you didn't think I'd be that hacky, did you?

Everyone thinks I'm a man and I don't really get offended because it's the internet and I'm breaking international law by being here and not being a man. That and I tend to act like one on the Internet. So this is an OOC page, and despite that I'm filling it with mere half truths. Things I want to be true but currently aren't. I might throw around hints as to why that is in the text so pay attention if you... care that much. Creep.

I realized that the South was actually far more libertarian than most give it credit for around the time I was 16. My dad, upland Southerner from middle Tennessee, was an ardent Ron Paul supporter in 2008, and an article about how Tennessee failed to pass a 'bathroom bill' ordinance helped, but the biggest thing was just living there. I might have been born and currently reside in California, but my early to mid childhood was spent in Tennessee and as such what I'm hard-wired to consider home is located closer to Alabama than Arizona. To this day I look at pictures of the place and swoon over the Linklush forests, rolling hills, clear skies...

But anyway, most Southerners just want to be left alone. So I figured that if the US split (which I am actually all in favor of in real life), they would probably favor a central government not very involved at all, almost at more of a confederal level. I learned about the U.S. under the Articles of Confederation and the early political system in my history class and I was just thinking 'man, that would be great', so I adapted that to fit the South's rejection of authority to create a state where the central government is nearly vestigial in nature, because I think that would probably make the South very happy, knowing that each state can do what they consider to be in their own best interest and not what's in the best interest of the opposite end of the country.

And in the end it's because it would make me and a lot of other people very happy to have our own affairs handled by none other than ourselves. The current federal system is unsustainable and will eventually tumble down due to some way or another that the nature of a republic stretching across millions of miles just doesn't really work.

So you could probably guess at at least a few of my opinions by now:

I'm ardently pro-gun. The NFA should be repealed yesterday, $200 is a minor fine nowadays and every feature it banned can now be simulated due to the advent of technology, and despite all of this these pseudo-NFA weapons are basically never used in terrorist attacks. Christchurch makes you want everyone with a gun to surrender it pronto? Who gives a church? Does terrorism work now? Censorship and gun confiscation was the shooter's whole goal and we're caving in and actively giving into his demands? He picked the gun he did not out of practicality but because it would elicit exactly this response, and you fell for it.

States' rights are the best way of reducing political tension. If some Californian and some Alabaman never meet paths or even feel their opposite political pull, they won't hate each other's guts. Simple as that. People don't like having their (usually perfectly reasonable for their specific situation) opinions invalidated by some ignorant rear-end-hat thousands of miles away in some other situation where his opinion works just fine. Slavery may have been a problem with it 150 years ago, but times changed. Nowadays even the most intolerant state in the country, ol' Alabama herself, has a majority approval rating for anti-LGBT discrimination laws.

Free speech is paramount to a society which runs on public opinion, and it doesn't protect speech everyone already agrees with. If free speech really were just about particular kinds of speech, it wouldn't be 'free' and it wouldn't even need to be a concept. Make everyone heard, even if it's some guy even more of a troglodytic swamp creature than I am who can't rub together fifteen brain cells to realize that less government and more government are antithetical, because then the political machinery doesn't exist to come around and bite you.

commies = no food lamo xdddd

I don't really care about someone's external features. Who really cares if you're black, white, gay, straight, or trans? It just matters what you do with your life. Are you going to be a good person or a bad person? I don't give brownie points for someone's race, orientation, or gender. I give brownie points for someone who legitimately cares about other people and doesn't act like the business end of the digestive system. That's also why I tend to be more critical of really rich people who try to pretend they're social activists when they really couldn't care less. 'Biological cosplaying' isn't really something I consider a big societal hurdle since I'm well acquainted with it and can vouch for it being a minor part of who someone is.

I'm not full on lost cause but at the same time slavery was not the sole, exclusive cause of the WBTS. If it was, the proposed pro-slavery Constitutional amendment would have placated the CSA enough to return to the Union. However, I recognize that the CSA's constitution was pretty much not a drop from a cracked egg more libertarian than the USA's, given that it was a carbon copy of it. Instead, what I think happened was that cultural shift, several protectionist tariffs, and finally the election of the Republican president on the platform of no slave states out west and a tariff to make up for the Panic of '57 just lead up to a point of no return.

As far as my apolitical interests go, I'm very into vexillology, and flags are probably the most common file I have on my hard drive beside the thing I dare not mention despite everyone here knowing what pubescents like to do in their spare time. On the side, I do programming, writing, drawing, very occasional musical composition, read, and I do very infrequently play video games, typically Pokémon, Quake, and Tetris. I used to have a presence on but I realized the way I ran my account was just bad and deleted it. Might return once I've thought up a better solution.

I like making and drinking tea. Shocker based on the Most Infamous Factbook™. Sewing is also pretty fun but I don't get the chance to do it for much more than fixing clothes. I hope to one day make a couple 2040 CSA flags, though. And I did used to participate in my parents' garden, but when we moved away from Tennessee we didn't get any properties with large backyards so I never got the chance to pick that back up.

I was in my high school's AFJROTC unit, and participated in the drill team. But I'm graduated now so it's moot. Was fun though.

I'm sure everyone here would be shocked to find out that President Washington is an unflagging, shameless self insert. Even down to the same birth month. It's not subtle. Harrington has very few of my characteristics however.

Send me a telegram if you want to, I'm open to receiving them.

Redoing this because new year, new me. The old one was too long winded and tried too hard to be funny.

Anyway, I'm nobody special. My name's April Jefferson. A high school graduate, born in California but raised by the Tennessee hills. There's me to the left, blind, unable to smell, and wearing a dumb hat. It's comfortable though, and I will always love a trapper hat. And yes, that actually is me, drawn on top of my actual face. All you really need to know about me is that when I was 7, I tried to plant a roasted, salted pumpkin seed in my parents' vegetable garden.

But I'll go on anyway, to satisfy the curiosity of anyone who clicked on this specifically to learn about someone who doesn't really matter to their life. I consider Manchester, Tennessee to be my hometown because it's there that my earliest memories take place. Sure, any birth certificate would tell you I'm a Californian (and other unfortunate circumstances of birth), but in my core I'm kind of a fusion. Just like my race. [laugh track]

I wanted to be in the Navy. That didn't work out. Nowadays I don't mind, I'm a libertarian. Nearly an ancap, but not quite, I can see some value in government, I just think it's inevitable it will get corrupted. Certainly not the type to do any sort of avoidable military service. But if necessary I might give it a go. My dad was a Ron Paul supporter in 2008, and I kinda agree with him.

Anyway, enough of that, anyone want to talk about nuclear energy? Because I'm always up to talk about nuclear energy. I've spent the last four years of my life keeping tabs on how we make energy, absorbing all the knowledge of those coming before me, and now I'm a fanatic of nuclear power. It's my life dream to see them come to fruition, and I'd totally love to operate one one day. I'm fairly knowledgeable in the field, especially for an 18 year old, so if your nation needs an energy advisor, I'm totally open to it. One time I even came up with a plan to build a molten-salt reactor out of junk metal. Didn't end up happening but I would have been super proud if I was able to build the first MSR in the United States since the MSRE ended in 1969. Stupid, I know, but I was fourteen at the time, not exactly the age at which one comes up with sensible plans. Send me a telegram if interested. But for now, I'll keep myself busy with other things, just keeping tabs on where energy is going. It's not optimistic.

But that's another story for another time (a.k.a. the main factbook, which details the oil crash fairly well). I tend to do that. Just go on tangents, I mean. It's just how I think, I guess. I have issues communicating with others, which is why I spend a decent amount of time on here whenever I remember this place exists.

My polcomp. Pure lib, fairly right.
So, political views. This is a political website after all. I don't really care about politics much, I care more about just having a good place to live. Otherwise, I'm pretty right wing. Not like the "ban the gays" kind of right wing, I don't really consider myself a super big conservative; socially, I don't think most issues should even be a matter of government. I just think socialism don't really scale as well as capitalism does, and communism doesn't work at all. So I'm a pretty big free market capitalist all things considered, combine that with being socially apathetic you get someone nobody likes except fellow progressive libertarians. Which isn't a huge market, all things considered.

Basically, President Bailey Washington is a pretty shameless self insert, down to her name being an old one I used to go by online when I cared about anonymity. Certainly some details are fictionalized; anything after age 18 is completely fabricated, but based on what I'd like to see happen. And in a sick, perverse way, the Confederacy and its world of a broken America is based on my own idea for how best to move forward. Not shown, but canon, is that China and Russia split apart as well due to the oil crisis, leaving Brazil and India as surprising world powers.

So, why all this? Well, basically, I can see the writing on the wall from where I'm sitting. 2020 has just been confirming what I've been saying since 2018 and feeling even earlier; America is just too diverse and will rip itself apart from the seams. That's not inherently a bad thing, either, but I can see it happening unless the stars line up just right. After all, didn't Yugoslavia experience much the same?

The Confederacy is kind of my ideal end scenario of all this violence. A stroke of the pen and all the problems wash away. That's all I want, really. All the tension and strife to just go away. If I could live the rest of my life as a gunsmith (and occasional wordsmith) in Virginia and not have to worry about anything going on in New York or Oregon or California, I'd be happy. I don't want to see Civil War II: Electric Boogaloo, I really don't. It may be necessary, it may be inevitable, and I'd be sad to see it happen, destroying so many lives in the process. But it'll come, I'll tell you. It might even be closer than you think.

Alright, then why libertarian?

Well, much of the South is libertarian. At least, the Upland South (Appalachia and the surrounding states, and south Missouri and Oklahoma if you're being generous). As said before, Dad was a Ron Paul supporter and he's thoroughbred Tennesseean. Sure, you get your authrights and your authlefts in major cities like Atlanta or Nashville, but generally, Upland Southerners just want to be left alone. We just want peace and quiet to live our lives, and not have someone thousands of miles away from us tell us how to do our work. And certainly, there's people willing to defend that at all costs. The Deep South... well, I can't speak for them. They're authoritarian, but on a decentralized level, so they're not too big of a thorn in my side.

So there's my manifesto, I suppose. Let's settle down with some hobbies, all of which I'd rather do than think about politics.

I like cooking. Especially the end product of it, though the whole thing is pretty enjoyable. Making tea is something I spend so much time on it's practically a hobby. Writing, as well. Maybe typing might be more accurate. I maintain a small fanfiction account to post stories whenever I feel the urge to write something, generally based on video games I've played recently. Most of the time it's Pokémon related. And speaking of Pokémon, I'm writing my own fangame for Game Boy. Hopefully it'll turn out good, I loved the Mystery Dungeon games so it's in that format.

Besides that, I like hiking, taking bike rides, and target shooting. Boy do I love target shooting. I just like guns in general, I suppose. I want to start up a gunsmithing shop to revive some old guns that haven't been made in a long time, because there's some gold in there waiting to be rediscovered.

And I've gone all this time without talking about sexual orientation or gender. I mean, other than the old bio I guess, but you shouldn't be reading that anyway. And I'll continue not to do so because it bothers me. I don't care and I don't expect others to care. It's my personal life after all. Whenever I see someone put pronouns in bio (or the NS equivalent, gender in signature) I roll my eyes. Call me a bad person all you like, I just think it's dumb to be proud of your gender or sexual orientation, or as dumb as it is to be proud of your race anyway. It's all luck of the draw. Doesn't affect who you are as a person. I'm sure this paragraph will net me some friends.

I'm a lesbian when I'm being annoyed by conservatives and straight when being annoyed by lefties. Or the opposite if the situation demands. Usually because of both of them making a mountain out of a molehill in regards to gender and sexual minorities. Ah, the wonders of bisexuality. haha lol jk i'm ace/aro
Just treat me as a living, thinking adult that has her mind in places other than her own immutable traits regardless and independent of gender or orientation and you'll be fine by me.

Anyway, yeah. I got to get going. I'll probably edit this more later.

—𝒜𝓅𝓇𝒾𝓁 𝒥.