by Max Barry

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Trading Cards

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0.74 The Armed Republic of Dutch Coolness's trades...

The Armed Republic of Dutch Coolness's Deck

The Armed Republic of Dutch Coolness has 140 cards: 5EPICS 23ULTRA RARES 43RARES 61UNCOMMONS 8COMMONS Value...

EPIC CARDS

Father Knows Best State
“Who dares wins”
Mentor
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,159th Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,361st Largest Black Market: 2,233rd
13.094 billion outlanders. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, anti-smoking policies, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Who dares wins”
Mentor
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,159th Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,361st Largest Black Market: 2,233rd
13.094 billion outlanders. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, anti-smoking policies, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Who dares wins”
Mentor
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,159th Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,361st Largest Black Market: 2,233rd
13.094 billion outlanders. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, anti-smoking policies, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Who dares wins”
Mentor
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,159th Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,361st Largest Black Market: 2,233rd
13.094 billion outlanders. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, anti-smoking policies, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Who dares wins”
Mentor
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,159th Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,361st Largest Black Market: 2,233rd
13.094 billion outlanders. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, anti-smoking policies, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE

ULTRA-RARE CARDS

Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“Scientia Potentia Est”
Most Efficient Economies: 172nd Highest Economic Output: 2,045th Most Cultured: 2,182nd
24.251 billion United Dependenciesians. Smutty television, pith helmet sales, and absence of drug laws.
SEASON ONE
Left-Leaning College State
“Xitapalewi wan amo xitaistako akon.”
Largest Publishing Industry: 107th Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 156th Most Cultured: 183rd
14.236 billion Cornese. Museums and concert halls, complete lack of prisons, and sprawling nuclear power plants.
SEASON ONE
Civil Rights Lovefest
“Concordia, Libertas, Aequitas”
Most Efficient Economies: 289th Largest Cheese Export Sector: 738th Most Developed: 908th
15.153 billion Arkiasians. Museums and concert halls, smutty television, and devotion to social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Each Endeavoring, All Achieving”
Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 175th Most Subsidized Industry: 183rd Largest Manufacturing Sector: 337th
10.424 billion Spexicans. Rum-swilling pirates, free-roaming dinosaurs, and flagrant waste-dumping.
Psychotic Dictatorship
“Hail to the Almighty Empress!”
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 135th Largest Mining Sector: 456th Largest Black Market: 480th
7.33 billion Upskians. Keen interest in outer space, ban on automobiles, and punitive income tax rates.
SEASON ONE
Psychotic Dictatorship
“Wor(l)d recreation”
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 106th Lowest Crime Rates: 156th Most Devout: 239th
8.782 billion Perang majuuuuuans. Museums and concert halls, zero percent divorce rate, and compulsory military service.
SEASON ONE
Corporate Bordello
“As well as we can do this side of eternity”
Largest Retail Industry: 262nd Most Cheerful Citizens: 295th Most Devout: 604th
14.539 billion Tarmsdenites. Museums and concert halls, zero percent divorce rate, and sprawling nuclear power plants.
Capitalist Paradise
“Nuke'em till they glow.”
Largest Populations: 460th Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 518th Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 946th
33.42 billion TJohnsonians. Sprawling nuclear power plants, frequent executions, and complete absence of social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Capitalizt
“You can't have a rainbow without a little rain :-)”
Highest Crime Rates: 32nd Most Armed: 56th Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 119th
26.347 billion Trashsylvanians. Museums and concert halls, unlimited-speed roads, and complete lack of prisons.
Father Knows Best State
“QUANTI CANICULA ILLE IN FENESTRA”
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 335th Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 425th Largest Black Market: 522nd
13.638 billion Taldeaoka. Museums and concert halls, sprawling nuclear power plants, and devotion to social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Democratic Socialists
“In Trimm we Trust”
Most Stationary: 843rd Highest Average Tax Rates: 1,189th Safest: 1,415th
20.885 billion Trimmanians. Museums and concert halls, compulsory military service, and frequent executions.
SEASON ONE
Corrupt Dictatorship
“Sumus invictus”
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 399th Largest Information Technology Sector: 605th Most Influential: 657th
14.266 billion Karazanites. Daily referendums, parental licensing program, and national health service.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Forever will we endure!”
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 89th Largest Mining Sector: 166th Largest Black Market: 231st
10.809 billion Valari. Otherworldly petting zoo, compulsory military service, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“United Though our Beliefs”
Most Developed: 634th Most Beautiful Environments: 634th Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 662nd
10.949 billion Stantenopleans. Complete lack of prisons, infamous sell-swords, and ritual sacrifices.
SEASON ONE
Father Knows Best State
“Progress over pleasure”
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 243rd Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 393rd Most Advanced Public Education: 621st
8.721 billion Kyroistanians. Barren, inhospitable landscape, sprawling nuclear power plants, and avowedly heterosexual populace.
SEASON ONE
Democratic Socialists
“Workers of all countries Unite”
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 249th Largest Welfare Programs: 451st Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 535th
7.559 billion Karlosians. Irreverence towards religion, devotion to social welfare, and stringent health and safety legislation.
SEASON ONE
Liberal Democratic Socialists
“Omnis homo sensibilis est ius libertatis”
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 112th Largest Welfare Programs: 246th Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 694th
3.625 billion United States of Saulians. Ban on automobiles, national health service, and irreverence towards religion.
Iron Fist Consumerists
“Supra omnes”
Largest Insurance Industry: 1,080th Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,277th Highest Disposable Incomes: 1,785th
6.67 billion Neuburgers. Avowedly heterosexual populace, strictly enforced bedtime, and prohibition of alcohol.
SEASON ONE
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“Our faith in our people is our strength”
Safest: 517th Most Beautiful Environments: 635th Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 639th
8.043 billion Eaerlannians. Pith helmet sales, free-roaming dinosaurs, and anti-smoking policies.
SEASON ONE
Compulsory Consumerist State
“We shall pull forward.”
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 670th Largest Retail Industry: 778th Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 802nd
5.305 billion Dolanetians. Triple-decker prams, smutty television, and otherworldly petting zoo.
Corporate Police State
“If money canít talk, why does it rule so well?”
Largest Insurance Industry: 233rd Most Subsidized Industry: 387th Highest Wealthy Incomes: 527th
5.81 billion Norse. Unlimited-speed roads, smutty television, and suspicion of poets.
Left-Leaning College State
“Hic Sunt Ad Manendum”
Highest Poor Incomes: 274th Most Scientifically Advanced: 292nd Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 419th
5.22 billion Osperians. Complete lack of prisons, smutty television, and unlimited-speed roads.
SEASON ONE
Left-Leaning College State
“Chill out, man.”
7.501 billion Hippies. Parental licensing program, unlimited-speed roads, and state-planned economy.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation

RARE CARDS

New York Times Democracy
“For the Congress and Citizens of the Alliance!”
Largest Publishing Industry: 2,995th Most Rebellious Youth: 3,449th Least Corrupt Governments: 5,467th
11.756 billion Angleterrans. Complete lack of prisons, anti-smoking policies, and hatred of cheese.
Father Knows Best State
“Ad Honorem Jura Nostra”
11.722 billion Sacheyenyani. Parental licensing program, compulsory military service, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
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