by Max Barry

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20.83 Kalatona's trades...

Kalatona's Deck

Kalatona has 100 cards: 6EPICS 25ULTRA RARES 52RARES 5UNCOMMONS 12COMMONS Value...

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Autocrats Alliance

4

EPIC CARDS

Father Knows Best State
“Strength and honor.”
Largest Mining Sector: 252nd Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 391st Highest Economic Output: 430th
30.913 billion Kelanthians. Flagrant waste-dumping, smutty television, and unlimited-speed roads.
SEASON ONE
Democratic Socialists
“Groovus!”
Healthiest Citizens: 30th Largest Agricultural Sector: 95th Best Weather: 108th
30.388 billion Rousannasians. Museums and concert halls, compulsory military service, and daily referendums.
SEASON ONE
Iron Fist Consumerists
“All for One”
Largest Insurance Industry: 242nd Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 300th Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 301st
12.981 billion Gorguinians. Parental licensing program, strictly enforced bedtime, and zero percent divorce rate.
SEASON ONE
Liberal Democratic Socialists
“This peace is what all true warriors strive for”
Largest Welfare Programs: 157th Most Advanced Public Transport: 183rd Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 189th
8.36 billion Dinner Blasterians. Keen interest in outer space, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation.
SEASON ONE
Liberal Democratic Socialists
“Stop reading my motto!”
Most Inclusive: 4th Largest Welfare Programs: 8th Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 14th
8.032 billion Thalasseans. Lack of airports, hatred of cheese, and stringent health and safety legislation.
SEASON ONE
Iron Fist Consumerists
“Kill or be Killed”
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 102nd Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 109th Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 126th
6.554 billion Human Alliancesians. Enslaved workforce, flagrant waste-dumping, and smutty television.
SEASON ONE

ULTRA-RARE CARDS

Civil Rights Lovefest
“A.E.I.O.U”
Most Efficient Economies: 21st Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 710th Largest Basket Weaving Sector: 763rd
19.2 billion Auzkhians. Keen interest in outer space, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare.
Left-Leaning College State
“Better than a 1st ed Charizard!”
Most Stationary: 400th Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 769th Most Rebellious Youth: 1,412th
26.583 billion Xomicians. Keen interest in outer space, smutty television, and ubiquitous missile silos.
Left-wing Utopia
“Dum Spiro Spero”
Most Efficient Economies: 570th Most Advanced Public Education: 766th Smartest Citizens: 940th
13.752 billion Jonbodians. Keen interest in outer space, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates.
SEASON ONE
Left-Leaning College State
“Moving forwards”
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 57th Most Efficient Economies: 596th Highest Disposable Incomes: 745th
18.276 billion kaeths. Daily referendums, anti-smoking policies, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies.
SEASON ONE
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“Arisen From the Ashes”
13.781 billion Lamporians. Museums and concert halls, ubiquitous missile silos, and keen interest in outer space.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Left-Leaning College State
“Come hail the dawn of a new day!”
Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 390th Most Efficient Economies: 1,011th Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 1,122nd
14.309 billion Patridians. Public floggings, anti-smoking policies, and hatred of cheese.
SEASON ONE
Left-Leaning College State
“We Think, Therefore We Are.”
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 293rd Most Rebellious Youth: 567th Most Cultured: 797th
22.673 billion Vitsians. Free-roaming dinosaurs, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and ubiquitous missile silos.
SEASON ONE
Iron Fist Socialists
“In 2.39 We Trust”
Largest Black Market: 803rd Most Advanced Defense Forces: 816th Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 875th
29.429 billion Mewtwonians. Barren, inhospitable landscape, parental licensing program, and complete absence of social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Civil Rights Lovefest
“Together, we make a whole”
Largest Populations: 58th Most Influential: 211th Largest Publishing Industry: 356th
34.768 billion Emoroids. Museums and concert halls, sprawling nuclear power plants, and frequent executions.
SEASON ONE
Civil Rights Lovefest
“Freedom is a Right”
Most Stationary: 1,205th Largest Populations: 2,717th Most Extensive Civil Rights: 8,433rd
24.897 billion Mackenzie Explorerians. Absence of drug laws.
Capitalist Paradise
“Nulli expugnabilis hosti”
Highest Economic Output: 674th Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 678th Highest Disposable Incomes: 1,107th
28.397 billion Bloatnikovians. Strictly enforced bedtime, anti-smoking policies, and suspicion of poets.
SEASON ONE
New York Times Democracy
“Don't worry, be happy!”
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 424th Most Rebellious Youth: 575th Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 607th
25.33 billion Grand Greatlandians. Keen interest in outer space, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and irreverence towards religion.
SEASON ONE
Capitalist Paradise
“To serve is to live”
Largest Populations: 105th Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 270th Highest Economic Output: 369th
34.556 billion Eurekans. Barren, inhospitable landscape, rampant corporate plagiarism, and daily referendums.
SEASON ONE
Anarchy
“Municipio da bahia”
Most Extensive Civil Rights: 651st Most Extreme: 659th Highest Drug Use: 669th
9.657 billion Sao Salvadorians. Complete lack of public education, absence of drug laws, and complete absence of social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Democratic Socialists
“Luz, fuerza, valor”
Lowest Crime Rates: 302nd Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 369th Healthiest Citizens: 588th
11.902 billion Oronians. Soft-spoken computers, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and compulsory military service.
SEASON ONE
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“A More Perfect Union”
Largest Publishing Industry: 771st Most Influential: 1,225th Healthiest Citizens: 1,497th
15.767 billion Unionist Americans. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, unlimited-speed roads, and stringent health and safety legislation.
SEASON ONE
Capitalist Paradise
“For the Republic Empire of Armus!”
Most Armed: 577th Highest Crime Rates: 754th Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 897th
10.4 billion Republicans. Museums and concert halls, keen interest in outer space, and complete absence of social welfare.
Iron Fist Consumerists
“Freedom is controlled, your voice is not your own”
6.439 billion Niverions. Enslaved workforce, digital currency, and free-roaming dinosaurs.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
New York Times Democracy
“Freedom & Hope”
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 371st Most Cultured: 630th Highest Disposable Incomes: 659th
8.981 billion Oometzians. Keen interest in outer space, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Corrupt Dictatorship
“Jenhe kulolan surakre kurunno”
Largest Information Technology Sector: 164th Most Scientifically Advanced: 265th Most Inclusive: 450th
7.344 billion Astariaxis. Parental licensing program, smutty television, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies.
SEASON ONE
Democratic Socialists
“Stop reading my motto!”
Largest Information Technology Sector: 1st Most Advanced Public Education: 3rd Largest Cheese Export Sector: 7th
6.054 billion Heliosphereans. Teetotalling pirates, prohibition of alcohol, and restrictive gun laws.
SEASON ONE
Psychotic Dictatorship
“We will not be divided”
Most Advanced Public Transport: 415th Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 450th Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 576th
5.873 billion Kristatinians. Prohibition of alcohol, vat-grown people, and punitive income tax rates.
SEASON ONE
Iron Fist Consumerists
“Te Oln Yakwsi Yritcov”
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 525th Largest Retail Industry: 730th Largest Insurance Industry: 981st
4.536 billion Estonulians. Zero percent divorce rate, avant-garde cinema, and aversion to nipples.
Democratic Socialists
“Unity & Strength!”
Most Secular: 172nd Most Inclusive: 648th Lowest Crime Rates: 697th
3.881 billion Doultrenians. Ubiquitous missile silos, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and irreverence towards religion.
SEASON ONE
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