The Host of Zaporizhia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Yuriy Malashko with an even hand, and notable for its compulsory military service. The hard-working, cynical population of 24.934 billion Zaporizhians are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The medium-sized, moralistic, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Law & Order, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zaporozhye. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 24.6%.

The very strong Zaporizhian economy, worth a remarkable 1,285 trillion hryvnias a year, is quite specialized and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Gambling, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 51,572 hryvnias, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 157,542 per year while the poor average 13,085, a ratio of 12.0 to 1.

Voting is compulsory, Zaporizhia has designated Zaporozhye as its capital city, Yuriy Malashko has just been declared ruler of Zaporizhia in an international press conference, and Orthodox Church of Ukraine has been named as Zaporizhia's national religion. Crime is moderate, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Zaporizhia's national animal is the javelin and its national religion is Orthodox Church of Ukraine.

Zaporizhia is ranked 38,607^th in the world and 4^th in Ukraine for Most Conservative, scoring 79 on the Bush-Santorum Dawning Terror Index.