The People's Republic of Zaldir is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its digital currency, infamous sell-swords, and ubiquitous missile silos. The cynical, devout population of 661 million Zaldirians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ðræsíkur. The average income tax rate is 47.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong Zaldirian economy, worth 48.2 trillion Dinars a year, is dominated by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 72,851 Dinars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

There has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates, Leader's opponents have adopted dogs to chase away the mailman, professionals are ready to retire by the time they receive permission to use their credentials, and pet loving officers arrest citizens who don't give their dogs enough biscuits. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zaldir's national animal is the Arctic fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Zaldir is ranked 103,241^st in the world and 4,732^nd in The North Pacific for Smartest Citizens, with 32.65 quips per hour.