The United Socialist Republics of Zaeli is a massive, genial nation, ruled by President Zel Roberts with a fair hand, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, smutty television, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.825 billion Zaelians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Xerum. The average income tax rate is 88.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Zaelian economy, worth 230 trillion Zaelian Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 126,504 Zaelian Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Many friends and relatives of President Zel Roberts have been given ambassador jobs in tropical island nations, the new 'Who Wants To Be A Politician' election debate auditions are more popular than the debates themselves, foreign planes and migratory birds are shot down as spies, and unwary hikers climbing the bluffs of Mount Xerum make great practice for foreign snipers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zaeli's national animal is the Great Zaelian Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Zaeli is ranked 180,238^th in the world and 7,270^th in The North Pacific for Highest Drug Use, scoring 37.6 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.