The Federal Republic of Yahlia is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Kjeila Pentrăscu with a fair hand, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, irreverence towards religion, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.948 billion Yahlians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Belgrade. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Yahlian economy, worth a remarkable 1,999 trillion euros a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 223,467 euros, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Party leaders rely on horoscopes to create "ticket balance", government statisticians explain census inaccuracies by declaring that "Sith happens", citizens ask "how many crooks could a nunchuck hook if a nun had nunchucks too?", and people boast about their low income on their dating profiles. Crime is totally unknown. Yahlia's national animal is the badger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is secularism.

Yahlia is ranked 222,113^th in the world and 1,208^th in Europe for Most Primitive, scoring -405.42 on the Scary Big Number Scale.