by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 6thMost Ignorant Citizens: 15th
The PS2 Puppet of
Psychotic Dictatorship
Stop reading my motto!
Influence
Nipper
Civil Rights
Outlawed
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Xynlandia

Population14.082 billion

CapitalXXXX
Leadersome random guy
Faiththe best religion

CurrencyXynium
AnimalXylophone

The PS2 Puppet of Xynlandia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by some random guy with an iron fist, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, aversion to nipples, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 14.082 billion Xynlandians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of XXXX. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Xynlandian economy, worth a remarkable 6,497 trillion Xyniums a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, extremely specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an amazing 461,428 Xyniums, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation's orphanages and maternity wards have been nicknamed 'the Killbot Factories', the relatives of suicide victims tend to be angry rather than sad, a recent "genocide prevention" campaign includes murdering children based on their DNA, and art criticism in Xynlandia is scathingly destructive. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Xynlandia's national animal is the Xylophone, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is the best religion.

Xynlandia is ranked 215,016th in the world and 6,719th in the South Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring -35.21 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 6thMost Ignorant Citizens: 15thMost Corrupt Governments: 30thMost Primitive: 31stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 44thHighest Poor Incomes: 87thLowest Crime Rates: 88thMost Patriotic: 134thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 138thLargest Black Market: 173rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 256thHighest Average Tax Rates: 263rdLargest Governments: 269thHighest Average Incomes: 448thFattest Citizens: 489thMost Valuable International Artwork: 605thMost Avoided: 647thMost Conservative: 915thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,175thHighest Economic Output: 1,315thMost Armed: 1,535thMost Authoritarian: 1,970thTop
5%
Nudest: 4,014thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4,157thMost Advanced Public Transport: 5,216thMost Efficient Economies: 6,072ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6,590thMost Income Equality: 7,351stMost Secular: 9,986thTop
10%
Most Extreme: 13,799thLargest Populations: 19,534th
Top
1%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Patriotic: 3rd in the regionMost Primitive: 4th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 5th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 5th in the regionLargest Black Market: 7th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 10th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 10th in the regionLargest Governments: 11th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 12th in the regionFattest Citizens: 18th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 19th in the regionMost Avoided: 21st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 23rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 29th in the regionMost Conservative: 35th in the regionMost Armed: 40th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 47th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 62nd in the regionTop
5%
Nudest: 82nd in the regionMost Extreme: 90th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 109th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 118th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 189th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 192nd in the regionLargest Populations: 217th in the regionMost Income Equality: 271st in the regionMost Secular: 323rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, art criticism in Xynlandia is scathingly destructive.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, a recent "genocide prevention" campaign includes murdering children based on their DNA.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, the relatives of suicide victims tend to be angry rather than sad.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, the nation's orphanages and maternity wards have been nicknamed 'the Killbot Factories'.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, asking a cutie their star sign is always met with withering scorn.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, wheelchair-enabled paratroopers need access ramps to get onto planes but not off them.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, metal detectors at school gates make sure that teenagers are carrying at least one sidearm.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, withdrawal of support for drug addicts is leaving many with cold sweats.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, veterans' meet-ups involve a lot of tail sniffing.
  • : Following new legislation in Xynlandia, foreign envoys that want to visit Xynlandia now have to navigate real minefields in addition to the political ones.

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