The Commonwealth of Xarikistani Diplomat is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Prime Minister Sebastian with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, prohibition of alcohol, and otherworldly petting zoo. The compassionate, democratic population of 2.037 billion Xarikistani enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Modvil. The average income tax rate is 27.7%.

The powerhouse Xarikistani economy, worth 183 trillion Xaris a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 89,928 Xaris, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.3 times as much as the poorest.

Construction workers evacuate work sites after finding sharp rocks on the ground, sales of pregnancy testing kits are booming, Xarikistani politicians are often described as having more style than substance, and judicial robes are the country's hottest fashion trend. Crime, especially youth-related, is moderate, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Xarikistani Diplomat's national animal is the Stimson's Python, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Xarikistani Diplomat is ranked 277,432^nd in the world and 15^th in Trading Cards for Most Primitive, scoring -180.3 on the Scary Big Number Scale.