by Max Barry

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Woonsocket was Commended by Security Council Resolution # 281
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 73rdLargest Cheese Export Sector: 86thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 121st
The Big Bull of
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
The Big Bull has spoken!
Bull Schmidt
Chief Executive Emeritus
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Very Good

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population36.63 billion

CapitalWooncow City
LeaderBull Schmidt


The Big Bull of Woonsocket is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Bull Schmidt with an even hand, and renowned for its complete lack of prisons, digital currency, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 36.63 billion Woonsocketeers have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The minute, corrupt government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wooncow City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Woonsocketian economy, worth an astonishing 16,600 trillion Moolahs a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 453,195 Moolahs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume, cremation is compulsory for the deceased, the nation's new Mylab space station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the planet, and voting is voluntary. Crime is totally unknown. Woonsocket's national animal is the Bull, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Bovinity.

Woonsocket is ranked 93,375th in the world and 618th in 10000 Islands for Most Politically Free, scoring 66.67 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.

Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 73rdLargest Cheese Export Sector: 86thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 121stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 124thHighest Economic Output: 130thHighest Disposable Incomes: 163rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 180thLargest Publishing Industry: 201stMost Influential: 202ndLargest Mining Sector: 207thLargest Insurance Industry: 287thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 313thSmartest Citizens: 445thHighest Average Incomes: 488thLargest Retail Industry: 776thLargest Populations: 819thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 921stMost Scientifically Advanced: 922ndHighest Poor Incomes: 1,118thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,121stMost Efficient Economies: 1,148thRudest Citizens: 1,278thMost Developed: 1,733rdLargest Black Market: 1,909thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,962ndLargest Agricultural Sector: 2,283rdTop
Longest Average Lifespans: 2,524thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,705thHealthiest Citizens: 2,710thLargest Information Technology Sector: 3,348thMost Avoided: 4,013thNudest: 5,769thLargest Gambling Industry: 6,341stMost Rebellious Youth: 6,383rdLargest Governments: 7,698thMost Valuable International Artwork: 9,175thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,567thMost Armed: 11,129thMost Cultured: 11,786thTop
Safest: 12,304thMost Stationary: 14,681stMost Subsidized Industry: 15,896thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 16,427thMost Corrupt Governments: 16,474thLowest Crime Rates: 17,650thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 19,291stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 19,654thMost Advanced Public Transport: 19,726thMost Secular: 21,629th
Largest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 2nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 4th in the regionLargest Populations: 6th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 6th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 6th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 7th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 9th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 10th in the regionTop
Largest Retail Industry: 14th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 15th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 18th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 18th in the regionLargest Black Market: 19th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 20th in the regionRudest Citizens: 25th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 26th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 28th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 28th in the regionMost Influential: 36th in the regionNudest: 40th in the regionMost Avoided: 42nd in the regionMost Developed: 44th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 54th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 56th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 58th in the regionTop
Largest Information Technology Sector: 62nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 93rd in the regionMost Armed: 97th in the regionLargest Governments: 117th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 118th in the regionMost Stationary: 120th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Woonsocket was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Cultured and Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, voting is voluntary.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, the nation's new Mylab space station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the planet.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, cremation is compulsory for the deceased.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, anyone who so much as frowns risks being referred to a mental health unit.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, people reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, polite commuters on the Wooncow City Metro always let hurried workers off the train first.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, Bull Schmidt has more friends than ever before.
  • : Following new legislation in Woonsocket, a suspicious number of male students have joined the Ladies' Wrestling League.


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