The Academic Dominion of Woollevia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by His Royal Swellness with an iron fist, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, avowedly heterosexual populace, and vat-grown people. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 26.141 billion Woollevians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry and Administration also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Woolham. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 67.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Woollevian economy, worth an astonishing 16,299 trillion lugnuts a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Soda Sales. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is a breathtaking 623,526 lugnuts, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,983,230 per year while the poor average 149,246, a ratio of 13.3 to 1.

The nation won three wars against Brancaland this weekend, space has been brought down to earth with constellations of cancer cases across Woollevia, contestants on Woollevia's Got Talent are screened by the government to make sure that they actually have talent, and homes have been banned from having any more than one wheel. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Woollevia's national animal is the kraken, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Our Lady of the Red Ball.

Woollevia is ranked 1,661^st in the world and 95^th in Lazarus for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 200,152.1 Standard Monetary Units.