The Kingdom of Witlend is a huge, safe nation, renowned for its national health service, irreverence towards religion, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 485 million Witlendians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Norbken. The average income tax rate is 51.3%.

The sizeable but inefficient Witlendian economy, worth 17.8 trillion francs a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Furniture Restoration, and Gambling. Black market activity is extensive. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 36,634 francs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Government bureaucrats devote many man-hours to trying to measure unquantifiables, all technology must be personally blessed by religious officials before purchase, the only things Witlendians vote on are cutest crocodile competitions, and human resources employees have time for hobbies as harassment is designated "high praise". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Witlend's national animal is the crocodile.

Witlend is ranked 50,695^th in the world and 3^rd in Noxus pact for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 2,954.12 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.