The Communist Union of Walikaistan is a huge, cultured nation, ruled by Brezhev Lenin with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, otherworldly petting zoo, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical population of 762 million Walikaistanis are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Windies. The average income tax rate is 70.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Walikaistani economy, worth 91.7 trillion Walikaistani Ruppees a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Basket Weaving, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 120,309 Walikaistani Ruppees, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.2 times as much as the poorest.

Executions often take hours as amateurs attempt to find veins, sexually-starved male dinosaurs terrorise tourists during weekly breakouts from Mesozoic Park, ice-filled coffins are ominously positioned in the corner of every hospital ward, and asking 'does my bum look big in this?' leads to 30 hours of self-esteem classes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Walikaistan's national animal is the Walkiastani Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Walikaistan is ranked 212,796^th in the world and 7,854^th in the South Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 9.44 Obesity Rate.