The Californian Pirate State of Vlawarkay is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Wolfgang with a fair hand, and renowned for its complete lack of prisons, ubiquitous missile silos, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 6.51 billion Vlars hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ventura. The average income tax rate is 82.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Vlawark economy, worth 534 trillion Vlars a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 82,144 Vlars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The study of medicine is popular throughout Vlawarkay, artists are pillars of society, more than one company makes the board game Monopoly, and hiding wrinkles with make-up is illegal. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Vlawarkay's national animal is the swan, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Orthodox Christianity.

Vlawarkay is ranked 253,611^th in the world and 6,843^rd in Lazarus for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -16.6 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.