by Max Barry

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Highest Wealthy Incomes: 23rd Most Scientifically Advanced: 27th Rudest Citizens: 28th
The Directorate of
Capitalist Paradise
वज्रमात अस्ता रिजथम
Influence
Hermit
Founder
Region
Civil Rights
Very Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Below Average

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Valkalan

Population18.779 billion

CapitalRavingard
LeaderDirector Ottar Vjanholst

CurrencySyn
AnimalNorth Sea Octopus

The Directorate of Valkalan is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Director Ottar Vjanholst with an even hand, and remarkable for its frequent executions, flagrant waste-dumping, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 18.779 billion Valks are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Defense, with Education and Industry also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ravingard. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Valk economy, worth an astonishing 11,066 trillion Syns a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is a breathtaking 589,314 Syns, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,396,853 per year while the poor average 23,129, a ratio of 190 to 1.

Customs officials often double as wedding officiants, personal injury lawyers are demanding compensation from the government after recent reductions in manufacturer liability, travellers are often forcibly evicted by torch-bearing mobs, and nine-year-olds' chat logs are scoured for evidence of radicalization. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Valkalan's national animal is the North Sea Octopus, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Valkalan is ranked 153,893rd in the world and 1st in Zarathustra for Most Advanced Law Enforcement, scoring 241.86 on the Orwell Orderliness Index.

Top
1%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 23rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 27thRudest Citizens: 28thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 48thHighest Disposable Incomes: 54thFattest Citizens: 71stMost Avoided: 74thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 81stHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 97thLargest Information Technology Sector: 99thMost Armed: 109thHighest Average Incomes: 109thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 110thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 119thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 122ndLargest Retail Industry: 123rdHighest Crime Rates: 156thLargest Gambling Industry: 177thLargest Mining Sector: 206thSmartest Citizens: 215thMost Secular: 216thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 227thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 238thHighest Economic Output: 242ndLargest Insurance Industry: 345thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 479thMost Rebellious Youth: 498thLargest Publishing Industry: 591stMost Corrupt Governments: 722ndLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 841stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1,072ndMost Efficient Economies: 1,074thMost Cultured: 1,268thLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,713thTop
5%
Most Stationary: 2,195thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,296thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 4,946thLargest Black Market: 4,984thLargest Populations: 5,578thMost Pro-Market: 5,963rdMost Influential: 7,876thLargest Governments: 8,610thTop
10%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 9,573rdHighest Drug Use: 16,027th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, nine-year-olds' chat logs are scoured for evidence of radicalization.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, travellers are often forcibly evicted by torch-bearing mobs.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, personal injury lawyers are demanding compensation from the government after recent reductions in manufacturer liability.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, customs officials often double as wedding officiants.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, many mayors are barely in office before being kicked out for minor parking violations.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, both diets and economic output are growing leaner with recent restrictions to free trade.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, waste is frequently shipped to other countries.
  • : Valkalan was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Agricultural Sector and the Top 5% for Largest Governments.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, competing private ambulances racing to be the first to traffic accidents are a major cause of road accidents.
  • : Following new legislation in Valkalan, hand-to-hand combat experience is udderly essential for all dairy ranchers.

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