The Holy Empire of Valerite is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Sir Arnold the First with an iron fist, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, keen interest in outer space, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.472 billion Valeriteans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of City of Valerite. The average income tax rate is 74.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Valeritean economy, worth 236 trillion Florins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Tourism, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 160,724 Florins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Long-wed spouses often regret proposals they made when they were twenty, residential tower blocks are surrounded by warrens of concrete tunnels, television executives are interested in turning Sir Arnold the First's zany home life into a sitcom, and teenagers performing appendectomies on their friends has become a popular schoolyard prank. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valerite's national animal is the Whale, which can occasionally be seen avoiding garbage in the nation's murky oceans, and its national religion is Arnoldism.

Valerite is ranked 21,531^st in the world and 624^th in The East Pacific for Healthiest Citizens, with 10.01 bananas ingested per day.