The Kingdom of Valahari is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Esteban Trueba with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, otherworldly petting zoo, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.103 billion Valahari are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Valahari City. The average income tax rate is 46.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Valahari economy, worth 163 trillion Valahari Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Information Technology, and Retail. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 148,246 Valahari Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.

Exports are stamped with "made by the invisible hand you commies", rebuilding efforts for a recently destroyed cathedral aren't expected to be completed for another century, popular websites like NationStates are blocked for "national security", and the general public only knows their favorite politician's first name. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Valahari's national animal is the Sand Panther, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Valahari is ranked 53,799^th in the world and 892^nd in the West Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 3,169.73 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.