Hydraulics

So you have fallen through the rabbit hole. The rabbit hole of browsing through my factbooks and digging up more sweet, sweet Urinetown lore. There’s a powder keg of knowledge out there, and one day, it’s going to BURST!

Say, I was thinking, we don’t spend much time talking about hydraulics. Do we? - Little Sally

Oh, this is Little Sally. Let’s just say she’s going to be a recurring character in my factbooks. If you can call italicized walls of text a “character.”

You know, hydraulics. Like hydration, irrigation, or just plain old laundry. Seems to me like with the talk of the water shortage, drought, and whatnot, we might spend some time on those things too. After all, a dry spell would affect hydraulics too. - Little Sally

But here’s the thing. Sometimes, when writing a musical. Uh, I mean creating a nation, it’s best to focus on one big premise rather than a lot of small premises.

The audience tends to be happier that way

Then why not hydraulics? Everyone knows that washing your clothes uses up astronomically more water than flushing a toilet. - Little Sally

Ok then, Little Sally. How about this. I change my nation’s name to Hydraulics Town, should I not? Where’s the punchline in that? How am I going to use fear to control the mass of rebels by threatening to send them to Hydraulicstown?

Let’s make a deal. I’ll give you this shiny new coin, and in return, you won’t expose our water hoarding here at the UGC? Or expose our pattern of monopolizing law enforcement and buying off the political elite? Or tell us what really goes on in Urinetown? This is just between the two of us.

Ok. I promise not to tell. Thanks for the coin! Bye! - Little Sally