by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 292ndSafest: 535thMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,208th
The Southeast Texan Republic of
Democratic Socialists
God. People. Freedom.
Texas Representative Council
Civil Rights
Very Good
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

United States of Woodward

Population23.023 billion

CapitalNew Houston
LeaderThe Big W


The Southeast Texan Republic of United States of Woodward is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by The Big W with an even hand, and notable for its zero percent divorce rate, compulsory military service, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 23.023 billion Woodwardians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Houston. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Woodwardian economy, worth a remarkable 4,339 trillion Dollars a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 188,498 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Flipping a coin to make a decision leads to a referral to Gambling Addiction Services, defense lawyers suggestively note to juries how flagrantly happy victims were, kindergartners' favourite dance move is the stop-drop-and-roll, and factories place endangered birds in their rafters in pursuit of government protections. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. United States of Woodward's national animal is the Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Catholicism.

United States of Woodward is ranked 25,246th in the world and 6th in Texas for Most Income Equality, scoring 75.63 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.

Most Advanced Public Transport: 292ndSafest: 535thMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,208thLeast Corrupt Governments: 1,264thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,271stBest Weather: 1,288thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1,319thMost Devout: 1,345thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,452ndMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,561stLowest Crime Rates: 1,561stLargest Governments: 1,628thNicest Citizens: 1,908thLongest Average Lifespans: 2,025thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2,106thHealthiest Citizens: 2,197thMost Compassionate Citizens: 2,294thLargest Welfare Programs: 2,357thMost Influential: 2,564thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,599thTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 2,891stMost Beautiful Environments: 2,951stMost Advanced Public Education: 3,155thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,789thHighest Economic Output: 3,903rdMost Efficient Economies: 4,178thMost Developed: 4,293rdHighest Poor Incomes: 4,605thMost Patriotic: 5,076thMost Cultured: 7,798thHighest Food Quality: 8,161stMost Valuable International Artwork: 9,082ndMost World Assembly Endorsements: 9,159thSmartest Citizens: 9,451stLargest Populations: 9,581stHighest Average Incomes: 10,525thMost Stationary: 12,511thTop
Most Scientifically Advanced: 22,683rdMost Income Equality: 25,246th
Best Weather: 1st in the regionTop
Nicest Citizens: 2nd in the regionSafest: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 2nd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 2nd in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 2nd in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 2nd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 3rd in the regionLargest Governments: 4th in the regionMost Patriotic: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 4th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 4th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 5th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 5th in the regionMost Devout: 5th in the regionTop
Most Income Equality: 6th in the regionMost Developed: 6th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 7th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 7th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 8th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 8th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 9th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 9th in the regionMost Influential: 10th in the regionMost Cultured: 11th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 11th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 6 » Darth Kermit, NewTexas, Tishanda, Indian Empire, Polish Nomads, and United Kodiaks.