The Resident Nutjob of United States of Minecraftia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Herobrine with an even hand, and renowned for its daily referendums, smutty television, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 26.477 billion Minecraftians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Nether. The average income tax rate is 91.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Minecraftian economy, worth a remarkable 2,488 trillion Mojangs a year, is extremely specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 93,980 Mojangs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Factories grind to a halt every time there is an election, there is an abondance of ackawi and zartschmelzend in every Minecraftian grocery store, rare art has become a significant factor in negotiating all foreign trade agreements, and food shipments to Brasilistan have been replaced with DIY fishing rods and unintelligible instruction manuals. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. United States of Minecraftia's national animal is the Supercreeper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Take It Up A Notch.

United States of Minecraftia is ranked 30,029^th in the world and 12^th in International Northwestern Union for Lowest Crime Rates, with 82.71 law-abiding acts per hour.