The Absolut Egghead of United Soviet States of Russian Empire is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Céleste Dusty Nixon with an even hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, flagrant waste-dumping, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, hard-working population of 11.32 billion Texans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Esperanza. The average income tax rate is 71.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient United Soviet States of Russian Empirean economy, worth a remarkable 1,191 trillion Rubleses a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 105,256 Rubleses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

People can't decide between preserving forests and buying print copies of 'Dogman Versus The Giggler', it is illegal to distribute Girl Guide Cookies without an advanced food hygiene diploma, hypochondriacs demand treatment for genetic disorders they don't have, and foreigners must sell an arm and a leg to afford surgery in United Soviet States of Russian Empire. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. United Soviet States of Russian Empire's national animal is the Americans, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

United Soviet States of Russian Empire is ranked 122,705^th in the world and 56^th in New Western Atlantic for Highest Wealthy Incomes, with 136,466 Standard Monetary Units.