The Holy Empire of Ump491 is a massive, efficient nation, notable for its triple-decker prams, state-planned economy, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.618 billion Ump491ians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 69.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ump491ian economy, worth 170 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Basket Weaving, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 105,495 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Orphans would rather live their life of luxury than be adopted by prospective parents, the government considers it a sacred duty to video bikini-clad beach swimmers, many suspect that the 'Whinny The Plop' children's magazine contains covert criticism of Leader, and the police double as repo men. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ump491's national animal is the Giraffe, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ump491 is ranked 11,834^th in the world and 479^th in The North Pacific for Largest Black Market, with 73.9 trillion Standard Monetary Units.