Population | 21.673 billion |
Capital | Fort Tzuland |
Leader | General Tzu |
Faith | Tzuism |
Currency | Gold |
Animal | Golden Pig |
The Military Dictatorship of Tzuland is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by General Tzu with an iron fist, and renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, public floggings, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 21.673 billion Tzulandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."
The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fort Tzuland. The income tax rate is 100%.
The frighteningly efficient Tzulandian economy, worth an astonishing 26,072 trillion Golds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 1,203,002 Golds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.
The police think a properly conducted criminal investigation is a real pain, the big red machine has ground to a halt, advertisements for jobs in the sciences run in fashion magazines, and creating cardboard imitations of missiles is a new top-secret military project. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tzuland's national animal is the Golden Pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Tzuism.
Tzuland is ranked 219th in the world and 4th in 10000 Islands for Smartest Citizens, with 359.2 quips per hour.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, creating cardboard imitations of missiles is a new top-secret military project.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, advertisements for jobs in the sciences run in fashion magazines.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, the big red machine has ground to a halt.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, the police think a properly conducted criminal investigation is a real pain.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, fashion magazine covers finally display realistic body images following photo-manipulation becoming illegal.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, the government has become increasingly militant.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, it is said that a Tzulandian woman's work is never done.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, the armed forces are locked in an expensive and bloody war abroad to stamp out possible terrorists.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, political activists are routinely executed.
- : Following new legislation in
Tzuland, dynamite sales and concert audiences are booming.