The Holy Empire of Twelve Titans is a colossal, efficient nation, notable for its complete lack of prisons, irreverence towards religion, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-working, democratic population of 8.504 billion Twelve Titansians enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The tiny, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Defense, and Healthcare. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.6%.

The very strong Twelve Titansian economy, worth 497 trillion Monies a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Door-to-door Insurance Sales, Pizza Delivery, and Book Publishing. Average income is 58,539 Monies, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 290,097 per year while the poor average 6,698, a ratio of 43.3 to 1.

Crime is a serious problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Twelve Titans's national animal is the Zebra, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Twelve Titans is ranked 142,588^th in the world and 68^th in New West Indies for Most Extensive Public Healthcare, scoring 603.89 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.