by Max Barry

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The Great Bountiful Empire of
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

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Full Titles and Manners of Address (Etc.) of the Tsars of TurtleShroom

In TurtleShroom, the expectation of humility in the populace carries over to its rulers. As such, the full titles of the rulers of the country are not to be published in international communications or to bring the attention of foreigners to whatever prestige the Emperors or Empresses may possess.

The proper manner of address to a Tsar of TurtleShroom is "His/Her/Your Most Sober Majesty". TurtleShroomian Tsars are formally referred to as "the Tsar/Tsarina", or informally, "the Emperor/Empress". The realm is referred to as an empire, or informally, a Tsardom. Specifically, TurtleShroom deems herself to be a "Great Bountiful Empire". When discussing or involving governing state, legal, and property matters, the imperial government and the Tsars exist as one legal person deemed "The Crown" or "The TurtleShroomian Crown".

To foreigners, the "full" foreign titles and signature of the Tsar are addressed as:
"His/Her Most Sober Majesty, Tsar [NAME], Imperator/Imperatrix, Head [SPECIES] of All TurtleShroom"

Using anything exceeding the above aforementioned title before foreigners, including and especially the below, is considered an offense to the Crown and is punished accordingly.

At the coronation ceremonies, funerals, and extremely formal, important state functions, the true, full titles of the Tsar are addressed as:
"His/Her Most Sober Majesty, Tsar [NAME], the X of His/Her Name*, Imperator/Imperatrix, Head [SPECIES] of All TurtleShroom, Tsar/Tsarina of All TurtleShroom, Emperor/Empress By the Grace of God, Khagan of Turtles Mushroom, Khan of the Myrtled Khanate, Khan of the Pawleed Khanate, Bondservant of the Masses, Servant of the Citizenry, Servant of the Constitution, Servant of Servants, Servant of God**, Honored by Congress, PWN, Grandmaster of the Order of the Para Sprite Virtuosos, Watchman of the Scarlet Guard, the Grand Prince/Princess of Jonesboro, Crawzford, Litlin, Nuekular, Max's Pass, Shroomville, Centriole, Barryburg, and the Swamp Outpost, Entrusted Over the Lands from the Dry Dry Desert, the Great TurtleShroomian Jungles, Swamplands, and Grasslands, Sovereign Over the Parishes Under the Realm, Generous Host of the Imperial Court, Protector of the Confederation, Guarantor of Parish's Rights, Son/Daughter of Heaven, Heavenly Sovereign, Defender of the Faith and Morality, Celestial Emperor/Empress, Overlord of the Order of PWN-age, Keeper of the Japanese Cloister, Overlord of the Shogun of the Greater Imperial Japanese Dystopia, Mother/Father of the Haiz, Defender of the Tsao, Overseer of the Tsao Dominions, Protector of Private Estates, Protector of the Christians, Protector of the Baptists, Protector of Old Believer Orthodoxy, Watchman of the Catholics, Watchman of the Taiping, Watchman of the Yue Shrine, Warden of the Chimera, Fount of Honor Beside the Legislatures of the Realm, Alderman of the Boyars, Keeper of the Keys of the Storehouse, Keyholder of Litlin, Keyholder of Old Reliable, Keyholder of the Means to End the World, Master/Mistress of the Atom, Shareholder of State Endeavors, Silencer of the Red Hydra, Top Agent of the Prohibition, He/She Who Strikes the Stores of Intoxicating Liquors, He/She Who Forfeits Gerry, Keyholder to the Chapel of Shame, Standing Before the Necron Pyramidal Privy, Resistant to the Alien, So Duly Elected and Annointed, Enthroned On Jones Found's Seat, and May He/She Reign By and For God Forever, Soley By the Consent of the Governed. Amen.

* = Tied to the frequency of the ruler's name. If the the ruler shares the name of a previous ruler, the X becomes a different ordinal number. So, for example, Tsar Dooley XIV, were such a ruler to exist, would be the Fourteenth of His Name.

** = Tsars that are not Christians have these specific invocations replaced with "the People" or "the Constitution", depending on the Tsar's preference. If it is not marked, the title stays.

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