The Absolute Madlad of Tulov is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Arkady Rossovich with an even hand, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, infamous sell-swords, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 7.014 billion Tulovians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tula. The average income tax rate is 79.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Tulovian economy, worth a remarkable 1,394 trillion Tulovian Rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 198,805 Tulovian Rubles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

Shady doctors seem to have impeccable records, the nation grinds to a halt for afternoon tea, older citizens lament over the loss of law and order, and the national security service are a bunch of crooks. Crime is totally unknown. Tulov's national animal is the Blackbird, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is State Atheism.

Tulov is ranked 166,752^nd in the world and 113^th in Conch Kingdom for Most Pacifist, with 3.23 Cheeks Turned Per Day.