by Max Barry

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Healthiest Citizens: 3rdLongest Average Lifespans: 4thHighest Average Tax Rates: 4th
The Fielzão of
Civil Rights Lovefest
Timão Eô!
Influence
Power
Civil Rights
Superb
Economy
Reasonable
Political Freedom
Superb

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Timao

Population34.838 billion

CapitalItaquerão
LeaderFofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto
FaithCoringão

CurrencyFifa Club World Cup
AnimalGavião

The Fielzão of Timao is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Fofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto with a fair hand, and notable for its rampant corporate plagiarism, free-roaming dinosaurs, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 34.838 billion Corinthians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Itaquerão. The income tax rate is 100%.

The enormous but inefficient Timaoan economy, worth a remarkable 9,120 trillion Fifa Club World Cups a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry. Average income is an amazing 261,811 Fifa Club World Cups, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Law schools are hurrying to teach the "prank defense" to their students, people with political aspirations study how to make balloon animals, elections have become procedural nightmares due to voters persistently rejecting candidates, and Fofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto's new door-knocking campaign has the sweet taste of success. Crime is totally unknown. Timao's national animal is the Gavião, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Coringão.

Timao is ranked 3rd in the world and 1st in The Proletariat Coalition for Healthiest Citizens, with 104.4 Bananas Ingested Per Day.

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Healthiest Citizens: 3rdLongest Average Lifespans: 4thHighest Average Tax Rates: 4thMost Beautiful Environments: 4thLargest Governments: 4thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 5thSmartest Citizens: 5thBest Weather: 6thMost Pacifist: 7thMost Advanced Public Education: 7thNicest Citizens: 8thMost Cheerful Citizens: 9thMost Compassionate Citizens: 14thLargest Welfare Programs: 19thMost Advanced Public Transport: 20thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 21stMost Inclusive: 23rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 24thMost Rebellious Youth: 27thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 44thMost Valuable International Artwork: 63rdMost Cultured: 65thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 66thLowest Crime Rates: 81stLeast Corrupt Governments: 112thMost Stationary: 235thSafest: 373rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 442ndHighest Economic Output: 556thLargest Populations: 1,049thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,143rdMost Influential: 1,468thTop
5%
Highest Average Incomes: 2,999thLargest Information Technology Sector: 4,717thTop
10%
Most Secular: 12,148thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 14,055thMost Subsidized Industry: 17,711thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 18,865th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Timao, Fofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto's new door-knocking campaign has the sweet taste of success.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, elections have become procedural nightmares due to voters persistently rejecting candidates.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, people with political aspirations study how to make balloon animals.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, law schools are hurrying to teach the "prank defense" to their students.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, a firework a day does not in fact keep the doctor away.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, Timaoan politicians spend a lot of time praising East Lebatuckese policies these days.
  • : Timao was reclassified from "Left-Leaning College State" to "Civil Rights Lovefest".
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, Timaoan watches list strained wrists as a common side effect.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, lifelong celibates are surprised to receive government-issue condoms in the post.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, 10-year-olds who struggle with integrating by parts are considered slow learners.

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