The Republic of Thorn14 is a colossal, orderly nation, remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, smutty television, and prohibition of alcohol. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.322 billion Thorn14ians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Thorn14ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,215 trillion Idks a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Furniture Restoration, Basket Weaving, and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 165,989 Idks, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 613,517 per year while the poor average 31,656, a ratio of 19.4 to 1.

A cyber-war between file sharers and the music industry formats hard drives across the country, if you go into the woods today you're sure of a big surprise, polygamy is legal, and Thorn14 City University is said to be the modern-day Tower of Babel. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Thorn14's national animal is the Idk, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Thorn14 is ranked 316,838^th in the world and 4,624^th in Suspicious for Most Pacifist, with 5.49 cheeks turned per day.