by Max Barry

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Least Corrupt Governments: 7,262nd Highest Disposable Incomes: 10,161st Largest Retail Industry: 10,986th
The Federation of
Civil Rights Lovefest
United We Stand
Minister of Motivation
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

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The United Continent of North America

Population4.7 billion

Capitalthe Capital District in Toronto
LeaderPrime Minister David Tremblay


The Federation of The United Continent of North America is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Prime Minister David Tremblay with a fair hand, and renowned for its complete lack of prisons, devotion to social welfare, and spontaneously combusting cars. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 4.7 billion North Americans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the Capital District in Toronto. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 9.8%.

The all-consuming American economy, worth 425 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 90,513 Dollars, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.

Jabbing a baby's bottle at officials gets parents waved straight through immigration, Prime Minister David Tremblay's recent "I have a dream that we will fight them by raking muck on the beaches" speech seems a little derivative to many, pausing for applause during a speech is seen as a form of censorship, and companies flee the nation rather than pay their fair share of taxes. Crime, especially youth-related, is moderate, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. The United Continent of North America's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

The United Continent of North America is ranked 122,822nd in the world and 8th in The New Earth for Most Primitive, scoring -110.68 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

Least Corrupt Governments: 7,262ndTop
Highest Disposable Incomes: 10,161stLargest Retail Industry: 10,986thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 11,515thMost Rebellious Youth: 12,404thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 13,722nd

National Happenings

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