by Max Barry

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Most Valuable International Artwork: 60thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 236thLargest Welfare Programs: 326th
The TUMS of
Democratic Socialists
Wealth Through Welfare
Civil Rights
Very Good
Political Freedom

Overview Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Unified Missourtama States

Population2.46 billion

FaithTrading Card Anti-Laundering Service


The TUMS of The Unified Missourtama States is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by TUMS with an even hand, and notable for its teetotalling pirates, ban on automobiles, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, humorless population of 2.46 billion Missourtaman are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Furbel. The average income tax rate is 97.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Missourtaman economy, worth 273 trillion souls a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Book Publishing industry. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an impressive 110,985 souls, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Occam's razor has sliced to pieces any childhood belief in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, the government has begun selling heroin and ecstasy to help fund its projects, paranoid museum guards keep a lookout for any animated displays attempting to escape the premises after dark, and popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. The Unified Missourtama States's national animal is the okapi, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Trading Card Anti-Laundering Service.

The Unified Missourtama States is ranked 36,065th in the world and 1,172nd in The North Pacific for Nudest, with 199.25 Cheeks Per Square Mile.

Most Valuable International Artwork: 60thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 236thLargest Welfare Programs: 326thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 476thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 690thMost Influential: 875thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 989thBest Weather: 1,256thMost Pacifist: 1,389thMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,733rdMost Advanced Public Education: 1,818thTop
Most Beautiful Environments: 2,215thMost Inclusive: 2,369thNicest Citizens: 2,419thLongest Average Lifespans: 2,485thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,748thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2,912thHealthiest Citizens: 3,711thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 5,026thMost Advanced Public Transport: 5,106thLargest Governments: 5,364thMost Developed: 5,584thLeast Corrupt Governments: 7,001stLowest Crime Rates: 7,721stHighest Poor Incomes: 10,895thMost Secular: 10,916thTop
Smartest Citizens: 12,882ndSafest: 13,366thMost Subsidized Industry: 14,132ndMost Income Equality: 15,418thMost Cultured: 15,517thMost Efficient Economies: 20,898th
Largest Welfare Programs: 15th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 16th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 20th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 26th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 41st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 81st in the regionBest Weather: 81st in the regionMost Pacifist: 97th in the regionTop
Most Compassionate Citizens: 120th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 122nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 140th in the regionNicest Citizens: 149th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 151st in the regionMost Inclusive: 158th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 172nd in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 178th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 200th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 231st in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 250th in the regionLargest Governments: 277th in the regionMost Influential: 306th in the regionMost Developed: 334th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 385th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 394th in the regionTop
Most Secular: 582nd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 601st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 682nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 697th in the regionSafest: 739th in the regionMost Income Equality: 761st in the regionMost Cultured: 792nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 996th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 379 » Zzozona, Republica Guilleana, Venicea, Shibutani, Minuda, Bala Mantre, Hardscrabble, Hamerica, Boston Castle, Cretox State, Westinor, Pope Saint Peter the Apostle, Xyrron, Praeceps, Harmonypine, Caselpania, West Zebrupco Bageropirex, Cartures, Imortan Empire, Ocharckia, Solimun, Pleasuretown, Nodnarb, Animu Place, Territorio di Nessuno, Lotion Empire, Ale Valatins, Neo Cheese Empire, Sakarna, JimBrownland, Black Spears, Koda-Land, Tir na Saoirse Alainn, United Island States of Southeast Asia, Feelonia, Healiopolis, Chukstik Illahi, Zazumo, Saint Christinium, Verytas, Former English Colony, SORT, Great Latiko, Bend Mai, Figyjharli, Great Bights Mum, Rockwell Islands, Pleroma Sans Romans, Fel Imass, 2 and 2 is Fish, and 329 others.Nordic-British Union, Dakota Territories, Holy Empire Of Greater Bavaria, Zimmerdachen, The Sansvich, Lulubellia, The Endless Eventide, United Kahndaq, Orado, United Asgardian States, Nouvelle-Guadeloupe, USSRITWILLWORK, United States of Americanas, Navsland, Innocentic, Daerlan, Picairn, Marmiedon, United Lokkia, Siglakan, Cosamaloapan, Jestings, Caffeinetopia, Tolopel, The True Frog, Termathe, Unsophisticate, Islanes, Anungu, Aerilia, Nationeer, Kuldi, Obelias, Empy, Guer Aike, Sisang, The Great Imperial Roman Empire, Dreadton, Gilakistan, Brucklania, Clan Spaniel, Dicko, Pazair, Principia Mathematica, The Tampa Bay Rays, Sikol, Caladann, Fran Advar, The Rhein States, Noahs Second Country, Abiswashyo-bhumi, Pallaith, Frances Francis the First of France, Maratabat, Tatrum, Advancia-Sizzletown, Kazoo Basin, Kingdom of Witcheria, Bankowiata, Inner lorrainia, The Turkish workers of Europe, Zdagoburg, Ethnon, Arichia, United States of Medford, Abonland, Dylanana, TJUN-ia, Eraver, East Supple Lund, OuterGalactic Federation of the Emu, Beaverwa, Dar es Saalam, Esplandia, Detrivania, Bruhast, Yaorozu, Liminyj, North Bratislava, Rainengrad, Democratic HomeLand, Northwest Zedonia, Dai Nippon Yamato, Corfad, Eri-Maqa-Ena, South Baba, New Upper Scotland, Varisland, Colonies of Free Temeria, Cokoland, Ardretia, Arrivederci, Pytong, Xanatosi, Fascist Democracy, Siwale, Lorigia, Lordelles, Callecul, Jerzykowo, Gendirt, Finchin, Altivia, Camikistan, David Davidson, Dacian Freelands, North Unity, Estados Sanikistas Federales, Notyoutopia, A Ordem do Caos, Walter Jackson, Wit Noreis, The Windmilluminati, Quentiam Viventem, Interdimensional Zone, Valentine Z, Vaireldanionistasi, Ver Testua, DIMAnism, Yokciq Empire, Aoncarpa, Aetulia, Testnation223, Sardona, Nova Arcania, Omnistria, Manticore utopia, Dejure, The Sinclarian Provinces, Federalania, Eastern Cous Empria, Kocherian, AVALOHIA, The Bureaucratic Territories, Florida Palms, Sevinland, Chadinton, Old Emporia, Srnsbaland, Joodey, Shizzy, Harveney, Khoik, Citrus Rutaceae, Runeda, Samfoychi, Partax, Central Ryal, Zemper Macro, Holy Oranz, Aruvicion, Ausnakulia, The Bikini Bottom Republic, Azzarel, Malta Comino Gozo, French Bananastan, Armandlandia, Salt-and-Pepper, Itallitopia, WOoloo Unitedstrtes, The English Alliance, Kim Da-mi, Jurisa, Imperial Pieserged, Oro-Yurdujan, Solcius, Brsil, Grieslhiem, Lucedeia, Saphrosynia, Florevana, Central Drazil, LostLegion, Free Culture, Dangine, GlobeCV, Why Seriously, The Unicrons, Yalgora, Wooleystan, Phoronu, Cabaifer, Xipher, Andanavia, Staurlanidgerumiegisordia, Gainesixtan, Bacciatto, Freuropic Wor, Heilhum Imperius, The Greylands, Zokk, TLTland, Religioncord, Iceria, Terrax, Angkor Raj, KhalChicken, SparkleMinds, Moszce-Walvard, A Salmon Named Harold, Verderiesdre, Rimausean, WeKnow, New Lakemba, Solphine, Entecavir, Yemet, I Anixi, The Jerichowan Country, Kragsgale, Riechelburg, Santalcine, U S Eh, Eywaan, Kheshiga, Schnuftelland, Soviet Terran, Konolas, Trance Empire, Kappacon, Sundred, El Fiji Grande, Kuveria, Dopeland420, Necromonia, Seridian, Singamadri, Tachycardia, Fizban, Confederacy of North America, Lemonbiscuits, Asoc lon, Aeurithianar, Batatoland Empire, Tamlra, Armandinia, Amerian States, Karazan, Cloydicia, Nistriabar, Xarrel, Karakalpak Republic, BeNeFiTS Of BeeFTiNS And FeeTBiNS, 5 kingdoms of Britannia, The Discipled, Draconian Progression, Wilkshire, Pauliestien, Kelvaros Prime, South Almyra, Zaeli, Arloria, The Most Freedom Ever, Hells Ninth Circle, Solmetria, Alenatia, Zachlend, North Armatas, Australian Socialist Commonwealths, Cors Evia, Potatolandium, Godwanna, Revolutionary Sealand, Eurochina, Ramiru, Diplomasqi, Jovian Knights, Whatever mo, Drutopia Insomnia, Miamington, Kranostav, The New Trumpland, Loutsland, Arimbia, WolfMessiah, Thneedtown, The AP Republic, Valhalla123, Nijisanji, Loli County, New Avian, Centromuria, Paul Pasch, Arlens Apartment, Gabenia, Porotia, Newpromisedland, Ibarkla, Lux Conos, Iron Cladia, Democratie, East Wushen, Fauzjhia, Falkendel, Sciency Advancement, Zecit, Merconitonitopia, Great Robertia, Serbia-Macebonia, Northern Glory, Cinnibar, Rad Lads, Alqulonde, Neo Colorado, Zumlandia, Zyvetskistaahn, Amblegreserland, The Papal Catholic States, West Papua states, Selfgradatude, Vesuva, Banis Dui, Gypsy Gems of Grayskull, Commoterre, Olofin, Outer Shenendoah, Dropey, Gautania, Changjo, Irvari, Xyroxes, Ammanies, Shadowrik, Vladmir Putin, Freyford, The Brunchovian Republic of Pina Colada, Sile Maungistan, Nuevo Navarre, and Navorden.

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