by Max Barry

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Most Primitive: 570th Most Ignorant Citizens: 756th Largest Mining Sector: 1,312th
The Oppressive Police State of
Iron Fist Consumerists
We LOVE oppressing Uyghurs!
Xi Jinping
Influence
Truckler
Region
Civil Rights
Outlawed
Economy
All-Consuming
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Taklamakan Desert

Population2.672 billion

CapitalReeducation Camps
LeaderXi Jinping
FaithMandatory Atheism

CurrencyYuan
AnimalCamel

The Oppressive Police State of The Taklamakan Desert is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Xi Jinping with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, frequent executions, and enslaved workforce. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 2.672 billion Taklamakans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Environment and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Reeducation Camps. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 48.2%.

The all-consuming Taklamakan economy, worth 380 trillion Yuan a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 142,527 Yuan, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 426,944 per year while the poor average 37,187, a ratio of 11.5 to 1.

It is impossible to get any work done as auditors swarm every inch of government factories and mines, a citizen who thinks a slave is a deadbeat is entitled to make the descriptor literally true, the nation's historic treasures have been sold off to Maxtopia's "Museum of Taklamakan Artifacts That They're Too Stupid to Appreciate", and motorbike jousters live young and die fast. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force. The Taklamakan Desert's national animal is the Camel, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Mandatory Atheism.

The Taklamakan Desert is ranked 37,209th in the world and 60th in Sonindia for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 3,718.61 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 570thMost Ignorant Citizens: 756thLargest Mining Sector: 1,312thTop
5%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,712thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,264thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,454thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,521stMost Avoided: 2,702ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,820thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3,327thMost Corrupt Governments: 4,074thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 4,376thLargest Black Market: 4,471stMost Conservative: 4,530thNudest: 4,792ndMost Armed: 4,831stMost Influential: 5,811thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 5,980thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 8,238thTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 10,929thFattest Citizens: 11,309thHighest Disposable Incomes: 12,430thHighest Average Incomes: 14,226thMost Secular: 14,463rd
Top
1%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Avoided: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2nd in the regionTop
5%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 4th in the regionNudest: 5th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 6th in the regionMost Conservative: 6th in the regionMost Stationary: 7th in the regionMost Armed: 7th in the regionFattest Citizens: 10th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 12th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 15th in the regionMost Influential: 15th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 16th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 17th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : The Taklamakan Desert voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Responsible Land Management".
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, motorbike jousters live young and die fast.
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, the nation's historic treasures have been sold off to Maxtopia's "Museum of Taklamakan Artifacts That They're Too Stupid to Appreciate".
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, a citizen who thinks a slave is a deadbeat is entitled to make the descriptor literally true.
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, it is impossible to get any work done as auditors swarm every inch of government factories and mines.
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, amorous nobles always bring the same disappointing gift to weddings.
  • : The Taklamakan Desert was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Wealthy Incomes.
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, the nation's most popular sport is sabotaging foreigners' hopes and dreams.
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, foreign nations often blame poverty and terrorism on Taklamakan selfishness.
  • : Following new legislation in The Taklamakan Desert, women mime their gynaecological symptoms with hand-puppets.

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