The Potatolactic DicTATERship of The Socialist Dictatorship of Potatostan is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Potato King with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, pith helmet sales, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.375 billion Potatostaniis are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Administration, Law & Order, and Industry also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Potatoland. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Potatostani economy, worth 173 trillion Potatoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Trout Farming, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 126,036 Potatoes, with the richest citizens earning 7.1 times as much as the poorest.

Disadvantaged youths often commit felonies to enhance their educational prospects, the nation's water should not be ingested while operating heavy machinery, buses are widely regarded as the safest way to travel, and the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Socialist Dictatorship of Potatostan's national animal is the Potato, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Potatoism.

The Socialist Dictatorship of Potatostan is ranked 245,565^th in the world and 1,325^th in 10000 Islands for Highest Crime Rates, with 1.99 crimes per hour.