by Max Barry

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Largest Soda Pop Sector: 1,542ndLargest Retail Industry: 1,583rdLargest Gambling Industry: 1,868th
The Croupier of
Place your bets, please
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Sands Casino

Population7.022 billion

Capitalthe poker table
LeaderLady Fortune
Faithgetting rich quick


The Croupier of The Sands Casino is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Lady Fortune with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, public floggings, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 7.022 billion gamblers enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Industry, although Law & Order and Healthcare are also considered important, while Welfare and Spirituality aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the poker table. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 3.8%.

The frighteningly efficient gambling economy, worth 965 trillion chips a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Soda Sales, and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 137,431 chips, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 498,780 per year while the poor average 26,969, a ratio of 18.5 to 1.

Virtually all of the country's economic activity takes place in the poker table, the Ministry of Health has reported a sharp increase in the incidence of delayed menopause, t-shirts displaying a photo of Lady Fortune performing the Full-Monty are selling out, and Tesco was recently named as the new national treasurer. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. The Sands Casino's national animal is the gambler, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is getting rich quick.

The Sands Casino is ranked 7,482nd in the world and 2nd in The Sands for Rudest Citizens, with 118.05 Insults Per Minute.

Largest Soda Pop Sector: 1,542ndLargest Retail Industry: 1,583rdLargest Gambling Industry: 1,868thMost Valuable International Artwork: 2,040thTop
Fattest Citizens: 2,356thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,400thHighest Crime Rates: 2,467thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,727thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,701stMost Avoided: 5,127thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 6,041stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6,279thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 6,504thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 6,506thRudest Citizens: 7,482ndMost Armed: 8,228thMost Rebellious Youth: 10,197thTop
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 11,395thMost Efficient Economies: 14,595thMost Corrupt Governments: 16,524thHighest Average Incomes: 16,612thMost Cultured: 16,839thHighest Economic Output: 17,699thMost Stationary: 17,722ndMost Influential: 17,738thMost Inclusive: 20,587thHighest Drug Use: 21,663rd
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the region

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