by Max Barry

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Most Devout: 1,359th Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,442nd Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,928th
The Red Holy Catholic Division of
Father Knows Best State
Deus Unus Me Iudicare Potest
Lord Knight John Peter
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend

The New Temple Knights

Population23.982 billion

LeaderLord Knight John Peter
FaithRoman Catholicism


The Red Holy Catholic Division of The New Temple Knights is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Lord Knight John Peter with an iron fist, and remarkable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, sprawling nuclear power plants, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 23.982 billion Knights of the New Temple are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Templarcardia. The average income tax rate is 81.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong a Knight of the New Temple economy, worth a remarkable 1,587 trillion Ords a year, is extremely specialized and mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 66,193 Ords, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

The credibility of anti-government demagogues is undermined by government claims that they smell like poo, every week is blindness awareness week, business meetings across the country are interrupted by the sound of squeaking whoopee-cushions, and truncheon-mounted cameras record the beating of criminals in dynamic HD detail. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The New Temple Knights's national animal is the Dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

The New Temple Knights is ranked 159,445th in the world and 4th in Vatican II for Smartest Citizens, with 1.36 Quips Per Hour.

Most Devout: 1,359thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,442ndTop
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 1,928thLargest Populations: 2,451stMost Primitive: 2,531stMost Influential: 3,901stMost Cheerful Citizens: 3,909thBest Weather: 4,673rdNicest Citizens: 5,607thLowest Crime Rates: 6,309thHighest Economic Output: 6,581stMost Compassionate Citizens: 6,621stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 7,405thMost Beautiful Environments: 8,194thTop
Most Cultured: 8,604thMost Ignorant Citizens: 9,206thMost Corrupt Governments: 9,799thLongest Average Lifespans: 12,695thHighest Average Tax Rates: 13,415thHealthiest Citizens: 13,652ndSafest: 13,941stMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 14,277th

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