by Max Barry

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Largest Cheese Export Sector: 5,320th Most Ignorant Citizens: 9,251st Largest Agricultural Sector: 9,714th
The Imperial Empire of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Dictator of nuclear affairs
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Imperial Estonian Empire

Population5.083 billion



The Imperial Empire of The Imperial Estonian Empire is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Quackerpingu with an iron fist, and notable for its aversion to nipples, compulsory military service, and irreverence towards religion. The cynical population of 5.083 billion Estonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tallinn. The average income tax rate is 9.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong Estonian economy, worth 325 trillion kroons a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Cheese Exports, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 64,010 kroons, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Prankster scientists legally change their names to silly pseudonyms before major discoveries, teenagers are told they're not thinking about sex enough, bureaucrats close new businesses for not complying with the Penguin Packaging Index, and restaurateurs put a lot of effort into persuading customers to accept wafer-thin mints. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Imperial Estonian Empire's national animal is the duck, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Quackerism.

The Imperial Estonian Empire is ranked 12,168th in the world and 1st in State Awesome for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 7,371.22 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Largest Cheese Export Sector: 5,320thTop
Most Ignorant Citizens: 9,251stLargest Agricultural Sector: 9,714thLargest Gambling Industry: 12,168thMost Authoritarian: 13,103rdMost Conservative: 14,684th
Most Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the region

National Happenings

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