by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,172ndMost Stationary: 3,286thMost Advanced Public Transport: 3,557th
The Bizarrely Localized Typhoon of
Father Knows Best State
How we laugh, and then we are melancholy
Eminence Grise
Haver of All Things that are Good
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Holy Therns

Population26.016 billion

CapitalThe Stormy Castle
Leaderthe Witch

Animalnose-like appendage

The Bizarrely Localized Typhoon of The Holy Therns is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by the Witch with an iron fist, and renowned for its public floggings, smutty television, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 26.016 billion minions are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Stormy Castle. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 81.6%.

The thriving a minion economy, worth a remarkable 2,320 trillion souls a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 89,184 souls, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.

Nobody draws smiley faces on receipts anymore, masterpieces by male artists are on display in the dumpsters behind the gallery, rich people sell their mansions to pay for endless rows of mobile homes, and corporate lobbying has been outlawed. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Holy Therns's national animal is the nose-like appendage, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is evil.

The Holy Therns is ranked 266,963rd in the world and 8th in Snazzy for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 16,409.94 Standard Monetary Units.

Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,172ndTop
Most Stationary: 3,286thMost Advanced Public Transport: 3,557thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,342ndBest Weather: 4,804thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 5,161stMost Beautiful Environments: 5,276thLowest Crime Rates: 5,502ndLargest Populations: 5,775thMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,897thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 6,842ndMost Corrupt Governments: 7,771stHighest Economic Output: 8,986thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9,056thMost Influential: 9,238thLargest Black Market: 9,671stLongest Average Lifespans: 11,101stHealthiest Citizens: 11,138thMost Patriotic: 11,680thLargest Governments: 12,840thMost Advanced Public Education: 13,380thHighest Average Tax Rates: 15,498thTop
Highest Food Quality: 17,542ndMost Secular: 21,163rdMost Subsidized Industry: 22,095thMost Inclusive: 23,756thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 25,625thMost Cultured: 26,557thSmartest Citizens: 28,209th
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: