The Democratic Minion's Republic of The Haughtherlands is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Supreme Sponge Joseth Spongister with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, prohibition of alcohol, and smutty television. The compassionate, democratic population of 2.178 billion Theditches enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Liquorice Lagoon. The average income tax rate is 88.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Haughtherlandsian economy, worth 198 trillion Sponge Sterlings a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Basket Weaving. Average income is 91,227 Sponge Sterlings, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Bemused schoolkids colour in their favourite quadratic equations with crayons, there's no cure or sympathy for the common cold, satellite images show safe electoral constituencies in complete darkness, and prison visits increase substantially during election years. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Haughtherlands's national animal is the Kitchen Sponge, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Spongism.

The Haughtherlands is ranked 16,846^th in the world and 532^nd in the South Pacific for Most Beautiful Environments, with 1,123.01 pounds of wildlife per square mile.