by Max Barry

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The Free Joy State was Condemned by Security Council Resolution # 333
Most Ignorant Citizens: 261stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 269thMost Devout: 412th
The Petrifying Procrastinations of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Obedience is Man's Greatest Strength
Influence
Nipper
Region
Civil Rights
Outlawed
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Free Joy State

Population14.58 billion

CapitalGrand Central City
LeaderExalted Holiness
FaithThe True Church of the Exalted Holiness

CurrencySweeting
AnimalDove

The Petrifying Procrastinations of The Free Joy State is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Exalted Holiness with an iron fist, and remarkable for its enslaved workforce, aversion to nipples, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 14.58 billion Free Joyers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Spirituality, Industry, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Welfare and Environment are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Grand Central City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 66.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Free Joyish economy, worth a remarkable 3,584 trillion Sweetings a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, Uranium Mining, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 245,881 Sweetings, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,287,126 per year while the poor average 25,199, a ratio of 51.1 to 1.

Government statistics suggest 115% of the population love Exalted Holiness, gossip magazines have been replaced by mask catalogs, the line of people waiting for a visa interview in front of foreign embassies is typically a mile long, and soldiers are taught to throw their guns at their enemies once the bullets have run out. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. The Free Joy State's national animal is the Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The True Church of the Exalted Holiness.

The Free Joy State is ranked 271,896th in the world and 7,649th in Lazarus for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring -7.75 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.

Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 261stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 269thMost Devout: 412thMost Primitive: 454thLargest Insurance Industry: 608thLargest Mining Sector: 975thLargest Black Market: 1,124thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,355thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,362ndFattest Citizens: 1,430thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,526thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,648thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,649thMost Avoided: 1,916thMost Valuable International Artwork: 2,234thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,405thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,469thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,633rdTop
5%
Largest Agricultural Sector: 4,087thHighest Average Incomes: 4,119thHighest Economic Output: 4,381stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 5,487thMost Conservative: 5,951stMost Patriotic: 6,885thHighest Disposable Incomes: 9,305thMost Subsidized Industry: 10,644thMost Efficient Economies: 13,261stTop
10%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 13,775thLargest Governments: 14,027thLowest Crime Rates: 14,245thMost Authoritarian: 19,847thLargest Populations: 20,476thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 26,726thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 26,733rd
Top
1%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 11th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 11th in the regionMost Devout: 18th in the regionMost Primitive: 21st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 36th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 40th in the regionLargest Black Market: 51st in the regionFattest Citizens: 60th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 64th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 69th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 70th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 70th in the regionTop
5%
Most Avoided: 84th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 86th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 87th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 107th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 111th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 116th in the regionMost Conservative: 147th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 174th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 196th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 197th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 224th in the regionMost Patriotic: 276th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 320th in the regionTop
10%
Most Subsidized Industry: 426th in the regionMost Extreme: 444th in the regionLargest Populations: 563rd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 571st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 604th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 624th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 643rd in the regionMost Authoritarian: 697th in the regionLargest Governments: 760th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : The Free Joy State's influence in Lazarus rose from "Newcomer" to "Nipper".
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, soldiers are taught to throw their guns at their enemies once the bullets have run out.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Manufacturing Sector.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Efficient Economies.
  • : The Free Joy State's influence in Lazarus rose from "Hatchling" to "Newcomer".
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, the line of people waiting for a visa interview in front of foreign embassies is typically a mile long.
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, gossip magazines have been replaced by mask catalogs.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : The Free Joy State's influence in Lazarus rose from "Unproven" to "Hatchling".
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, government statistics suggest 115% of the population love Exalted Holiness.

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