by Max Barry

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Issues Editor
Most Ignorant Citizens: 232ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 282ndMost Devout: 365th
The Petrifying Procrastinations of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Obedience is Man's Greatest Strength
Influence
Page
Region
Civil Rights
Outlawed
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Free Joy State

Population10.576 billion

CapitalGrand Central City
LeaderExalted Holiness
FaithThe True Church of the Exalted Holiness

CurrencySweeting
AnimalDove

The Petrifying Procrastinations of The Free Joy State is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Exalted Holiness with an iron fist, and renowned for its flagrant waste-dumping, state-planned economy, and fear of technology. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 10.576 billion Free Joyers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Spirituality, Industry, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Grand Central City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 63.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Free Joyish economy, worth a remarkable 2,519 trillion Sweetings a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, Uranium Mining, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 238,210 Sweetings, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,345,966 per year while the poor average 20,700, a ratio of 65.0 to 1.

Soldiers go to war dressed in cassocks and robes, believers who wear their faith on their sleeves make easy targets in hostile areas, unwilling fathers wish they had looked for a late-night pharmacy, and no true communist is an unbeliever. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. The Free Joy State's national animal is the Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The True Church of the Exalted Holiness.

The Free Joy State is ranked 99,387th in the world and 4,515th in the Pacific for Largest Soda Pop Sector, scoring 854.5 on the Addison-Fukk Productivity Rating.

Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 232ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 282ndMost Devout: 365thMost Primitive: 591stLargest Insurance Industry: 799thLargest Black Market: 917thLargest Mining Sector: 990thMost Valuable International Artwork: 1,220thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,351stMost Corrupt Governments: 1,361stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,405thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,460thFattest Citizens: 1,534thMost Avoided: 1,567thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,795thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,019thTop
5%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,582ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,903rdHighest Average Incomes: 3,906thHighest Economic Output: 5,198thMost Conservative: 5,747thLargest Agricultural Sector: 6,858thLargest Gambling Industry: 7,652ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 8,043rdMost Subsidized Industry: 8,356thHighest Disposable Incomes: 8,460thTop
10%
Most Efficient Economies: 12,040thLowest Crime Rates: 13,541stLargest Governments: 13,637thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 14,595thMost Authoritarian: 14,653rdMost Influential: 15,006thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 18,033rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 18,978thLargest Populations: 22,889th
Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 7th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 10th in the regionMost Devout: 13th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 18th in the regionLargest Black Market: 18th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 19th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 22nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 25th in the regionMost Primitive: 25th in the regionFattest Citizens: 27th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 31st in the regionMost Avoided: 32nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 40th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 41st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 42nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 73rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 78th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 81st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 82nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 95th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Populations: 127th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 193rd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 197th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 217th in the regionMost Influential: 238th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 261st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 282nd in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 299th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 317th in the regionLargest Governments: 333rd in the regionMost Conservative: 339th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 362nd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 512th in the regionTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 834th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 842nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 975th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1,024th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, no true communist is an unbeliever.
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, unwilling fathers wish they had looked for a late-night pharmacy.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Efficient Economies.
  • : The Free Joy State was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, believers who wear their faith on their sleeves make easy targets in hostile areas.
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, soldiers go to war dressed in cassocks and robes.
  • : Following new legislation in The Free Joy State, raindances intended to summon storms instead attract tourists.

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