by Max Barry

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Issues Editor
Most Ignorant Citizens: 265th Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 354th Most Devout: 429th
The Festive Felicitations of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Obedience is Man's Greatest Strength
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Deck

The Free Joy State

Population7.397 billion

CapitalGrand Central City
LeaderExalted Holiness
FaithThe True Church of the Exalted Holiness


The Festive Felicitations of The Free Joy State is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Exalted Holiness with an iron fist, and renowned for its state-planned economy, ritual sacrifices, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.397 billion Free Joyers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Spirituality and Industry also on the agenda, while Welfare and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Grand Central City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 55.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Free Joyish economy, worth a remarkable 1,634 trillion Sweetings a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, Uranium Mining, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 220,944 Sweetings, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 711,774 per year while the poor average 51,907, a ratio of 13.7 to 1.

Tribal villagers hide behind the sofa when missionaries knock at their doors, politicians that report exaggerated crowd sizes for their speeches are dismissed for being delusional, women are reassured that they're being oppressed for their own good, and there is no such thing as an innocent fling in the Free Joyish military. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. The Free Joy State's national animal is the Dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The True Church of the Exalted Holiness.

The Free Joy State is ranked 28,304th in the world and 1,124th in the Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 4,166.14 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 265thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 354thMost Devout: 429thMost Primitive: 581stLargest Insurance Industry: 730thLargest Black Market: 780thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,199thLargest Mining Sector: 1,239thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,326thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,474thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,576thTop
Fattest Citizens: 1,745thMost Avoided: 1,762ndMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,292ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,599thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,805thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,850thMost Efficient Economies: 3,488thLargest Gambling Industry: 3,500thHighest Average Incomes: 4,064thMost Conservative: 4,669thMost Subsidized Industry: 6,773rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,048thHighest Economic Output: 7,188thTop
Most Authoritarian: 15,252ndLargest Governments: 15,589thMost Influential: 16,835th
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 9th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 9th in the regionMost Devout: 14th in the regionMost Primitive: 15th in the regionLargest Black Market: 15th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 17th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 27th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 28th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 29th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 30th in the regionFattest Citizens: 31st in the regionMost Avoided: 37th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 39th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 49th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 50th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 53rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 54th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 59th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 66th in the regionTop
Highest Average Incomes: 104th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 109th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 153rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 162nd in the regionLargest Populations: 206th in the regionMost Conservative: 273rd in the regionTop
Most Influential: 361st in the regionLargest Governments: 383rd in the regionRudest Citizens: 444th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 466th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 494th in the region

National Happenings

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