The Allied States of The Eshurium Empire is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Douglas Lockjaw Jr with an even hand, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, otherworldly petting zoo, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, devout population of 2.062 billion Eshuriumeans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Hermeton. The average income tax rate is 67.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Eshuriumean economy, worth 281 trillion Eshuriumean Bisonlers a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 136,600 Eshuriumean Bisonlers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Workers tend to schedule naps during all-hands meetings, popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs, internet service is too costly for normal people to purchase, and Douglas Lockjaw Jr's luxurious new home has been designated as a protected cultural heritage site. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Eshurium Empire's national animal is the Bison, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Hermisim.

The Eshurium Empire is ranked 11,709^th in the world and 2^nd in Kerbals of the North for Healthiest Citizens, with 14.44 bananas ingested per day.