by Max Barry

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Largest Retail Industry: 687th Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 867th Largest Soda Pop Sector: 903rd
The Holy Patriarchate of
Compulsory Consumerist State
We shall pull forward.
Patriarch Oleg I Alexandrovich
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend

The Dolanets islands

Population4.421 billion

LeaderPatriarch Oleg I Alexandrovich
FaithDolanetian Orthodox

AnimalPit viper

The Holy Patriarchate of The Dolanets islands is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Patriarch Oleg I Alexandrovich with an iron fist, and renowned for its triple-decker prams, sprawling nuclear power plants, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.421 billion Dolanetians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt government prioritizes Law & Order, although Defense, Education, and Healthcare are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Карьград. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Dolanetian economy, worth a remarkable 1,022 trillion Дырмаs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Soda Sales, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 231,176 Дырмаs, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 819,736 per year while the poor average 47,027, a ratio of 17.4 to 1.

It's always rabbit season, governments opposing The Dolanets islands are beset by rebels, Eau de Trashcan has become a wildly popular perfume, and relations with Dàguó have warmed from frosty to chilly. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Dolanets islands's national animal is the Pit viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Dolanetian Orthodox.

The Dolanets islands is ranked 100,967th in the world and 5,485th in The North Pacific for Most Average, scoring 35.95 on the Average Standardized Normality Scale.

Largest Retail Industry: 687thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 867thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 903rdHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,282ndHighest Disposable Incomes: 1,309thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1,320thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1,333rdMost Avoided: 1,367thFattest Citizens: 1,374thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,508thMost Influential: 1,585thRudest Citizens: 1,663rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,820thTop
Largest Insurance Industry: 1,847thMost Devout: 2,171stLargest Mining Sector: 2,272ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,282ndHighest Average Incomes: 3,243rdLargest Information Technology Sector: 3,263rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 3,679thMost Corrupt Governments: 4,743rdMost Rebellious Youth: 4,812thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 4,942ndLargest Publishing Industry: 7,762ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8,809thTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,732ndHighest Economic Output: 11,340thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 11,647thMost Efficient Economies: 12,196thSmartest Citizens: 12,784thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 13,322ndGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 17,925thLargest Black Market: 18,035th
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 24th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 31st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 32nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 35th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 35th in the regionFattest Citizens: 37th in the regionMost Avoided: 38th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 44th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 50th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 50th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 52nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 53rd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 62nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 78th in the regionMost Devout: 82nd in the regionTop
Highest Average Incomes: 123rd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 142nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 152nd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 168th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 172nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 176th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 276th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 283rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 347th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 365th in the regionLargest Black Market: 396th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 399th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 468th in the regionTop
Most Efficient Economies: 581st in the regionMost Influential: 654th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 655th in the regionLargest Populations: 687th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 905th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 908th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1,027th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, relations with Dàguó have warmed from frosty to chilly.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, Eau de Trashcan has become a wildly popular perfume.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, governments opposing The Dolanets islands are beset by rebels.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, it's always rabbit season.
  • : The Dolanets islands was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, traffic cops spend most of their work-hours calculating citizens' monthly income.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, the nation's gold reserves are said to be somewhere over the rainbow (The Dolanets islands has found 5 easter eggs).
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, homeless people can be found sleeping on streets in front of unoccupied second homes.
  • : The Dolanets islands was reclassified from "Father Knows Best State" to "Compulsory Consumerist State".
  • : Following new legislation in The Dolanets islands, the nation's student exchange programs are something of a one way street.


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