by Max Barry

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Most Primitive: 1,505thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,188thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,272nd
The Holy Green Lands of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Pratum omnia vincit
Influence
Ambassador
Immigration Officer
Civil Rights
Few
Economy
Good
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Dark Lawn

Population15.353 billion

CapitalMo'Moni
LeaderGrand Pa Weir'Do
FaithGrandpaism

Currencycurmudgeon
Animalnational animal

The Holy Green Lands of The Dark Lawn is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Grand Pa Weir'Do with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, compulsory military service, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 15.353 billion Dark Lawnians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order, Public Transport, and Administration also on the agenda, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mo'Moni. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.2%.

The Dark Lawnian economy, worth a remarkable 1,105 trillion curmudgeons a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 71,996 curmudgeons, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 237,855 per year while the poor average 16,297, a ratio of 14.6 to 1.

Dark Lawnians caught jaywalking often have their houses seized by the police, weather reports simply advise Dark Lawnians to 'look outside', decreased demand for toilets is saving the prison service a lot of money, and girls in elementary school classes gaze longingly at boys playing tag. Crime is a problem, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. The Dark Lawn's national animal is the national animal, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Grandpaism.

The Dark Lawn is ranked 80,119th in the world and 3rd in Union of Autonomous Nations for Most Stationary, with 605.2680848504 days.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 1,505thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,188thTop
5%
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,272ndMost Ignorant Citizens: 4,266thFattest Citizens: 4,477thMost Avoided: 8,514thTop
10%
Largest Retail Industry: 18,813thHighest Disposable Incomes: 18,834thMost Armed: 18,973rdLargest Soda Pop Sector: 20,314thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 21,136thMost Cultured: 22,200thLargest Populations: 25,755thHighest Economic Output: 26,421stMost Devout: 26,759thLargest Gambling Industry: 27,571stLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 29,055th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : The Dark Lawn's influence in Union of Autonomous Nations rose from "Diplomat" to "Ambassador".
  • : Following new legislation in The Dark Lawn, girls in elementary school classes gaze longingly at boys playing tag.
  • : The Dark Lawn's influence in Union of Autonomous Nations rose from "Envoy" to "Diplomat".
  • : The Dark Lawn was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Dead and Most Zombies.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dark Lawn, decreased demand for toilets is saving the prison service a lot of money.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dark Lawn, weather reports simply advise Dark Lawnians to 'look outside'.
  • : Following new legislation in The Dark Lawn, Dark Lawnians caught jaywalking often have their houses seized by the police.
  • : The Dark Lawn's influence in Union of Autonomous Nations rose from "Duckspeaker" to "Envoy".
  • : The Dark Lawn was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Disposable Incomes.
  • : The Dark Lawn was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Patriotic.

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