by Max Barry

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Largest Welfare Programs: 9thMost Advanced Public Education: 25thLeast Corrupt Governments: 48th
The People's Republic of
Left-wing Utopia
Get up for the down stroke
Influence
Enforcer
Civil Rights
Excessive
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Superb

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Crooked Beat

Population35.173 billion

LeaderStar Child

CurrencyPyramid
AnimalUnfunky UFO

The People's Republic of The Crooked Beat is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Star Child with a fair hand, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, rampant corporate plagiarism, and daily referendums. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 35.173 billion Crooked Beatians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government prioritizes Education, although Welfare, Social Policy, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and Law & Order receive no funds. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Crooked Beatian economy, worth a remarkable 9,539 trillion Pyramids a year, is highly specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 271,227 Pyramids, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Walking to the local pizza parlour earns a lovely sports participation ribbon, government ministers have eclectic tastes in curtains, The Crooked Beat City's main city thoroughfare has been blocked by a row of leyland cypresses that mysteriously appeared overnight, and little kids often wonder why strange grown-ups are following them around the soft play areas. Crime is totally unknown. The Crooked Beat's national animal is the Unfunky UFO, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

The Crooked Beat is ranked 731st in the world and 5th in A Modern World for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 16,789.01 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Largest Welfare Programs: 9thMost Advanced Public Education: 25thLeast Corrupt Governments: 48thMost Rebellious Youth: 97thNicest Citizens: 99thMost Compassionate Citizens: 106thMost Cheerful Citizens: 167thMost Pacifist: 182ndMost Cultured: 205thHighest Average Tax Rates: 260thSmartest Citizens: 287thHighest Food Quality: 349thLargest Publishing Industry: 378thLargest Governments: 414thMost Developed: 415thHealthiest Citizens: 426thSafest: 434thLongest Average Lifespans: 466thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 522ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 532ndHighest Economic Output: 557thMost Inclusive: 603rdHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 703rdLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 731stMost Beautiful Environments: 820thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 857thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,067thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,126thLargest Populations: 1,334thLowest Crime Rates: 1,346thBest Weather: 2,080thTop
5%
Highest Drug Use: 2,719thHighest Average Incomes: 2,862ndMost Efficient Economies: 3,873rdMost Subsidized Industry: 5,805thMost Scientifically Advanced: 9,134thMost Influential: 9,276thNudest: 9,752ndTop
10%
Most Patriotic: 12,678thMost Secular: 13,623rdMost World Assembly Endorsements: 15,244thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 17,121stMost Extensive Civil Rights: 17,575th
Top
10%
Highest Food Quality: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 1st in the regionBest Weather: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 1st in the regionHighest Drug Use: 1st in the regionMost Pacifist: 1st in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionNicest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 1st in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Inclusive: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, little kids often wonder why strange grown-ups are following them around the soft play areas.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, The Crooked Beat City's main city thoroughfare has been blocked by a row of leyland cypresses that mysteriously appeared overnight.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, government ministers have eclectic tastes in curtains.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, walking to the local pizza parlour earns a lovely sports participation ribbon.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, recognizing the Crooked Beatian flag qualifies you for citizenship.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, airplane passenger seat sizes and ticket prices are both first-class.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, former stunt pilots are unable to pass the licence test to fly a drone.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, it is illegal for police officers to carry out searches due to strict privacy laws.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, 50% of adverts on children's television are for clothes made of cotton wool.
  • : Following new legislation in The Crooked Beat, vital intelligence-gathering activities are often put on hold for Call of Honor tournaments.

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