The People's Republic of The Crooked Beat is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Star Child with a fair hand, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, rampant corporate plagiarism, and daily referendums. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 35.173 billion Crooked Beatians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government prioritizes Education, although Welfare, Social Policy, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and Law & Order receive no funds. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Crooked Beatian economy, worth a remarkable 9,539 trillion Pyramids a year, is highly specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 271,227 Pyramids, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Walking to the local pizza parlour earns a lovely sports participation ribbon, government ministers have eclectic tastes in curtains, The Crooked Beat City's main city thoroughfare has been blocked by a row of leyland cypresses that mysteriously appeared overnight, and little kids often wonder why strange grown-ups are following them around the soft play areas. Crime is totally unknown. The Crooked Beat's national animal is the Unfunky UFO, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

The Crooked Beat is ranked 731^st in the world and 5^th in A Modern World for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 16,789.01 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.