by Max Barry

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Most Valuable International Artwork: 1,143rdLowest Crime Rates: 1,266thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,777th
The Scary Eye of
Corrupt Dictatorship
It's too bad stupidity isn't painful.
Magus L
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Church of Satan

Population15.896 billion

CapitalThe Decompression Chamber
LeaderMagus L


The Scary Eye of The Church of Satan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Magus L with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, digital currency, and state-planned economy. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 15.896 billion Satanians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Decompression Chamber. The average income tax rate is 97.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Satanian economy, worth a remarkable 3,001 trillion Greeds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 188,848 Greeds, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Babysitters are a thing of the past, stone wrist watches that weigh 20lb are the latest trend, the regional delicacy of chocolate bombes is deadlier than an unexploded bomb, and politicians frequently make unusual poses during speeches in hopes of inspiring the next internet fad. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Church of Satan's national animal is the Sin, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Satanism.

The Church of Satan is ranked 163,295th in the world and 3,867th in the Rejected Realms for Most Politically Free, scoring 26.29 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.

Most Valuable International Artwork: 1,143rdLowest Crime Rates: 1,266thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,777thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,836thMost Advanced Public Transport: 1,950thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,963rdMost Corrupt Governments: 2,003rdTop
Healthiest Citizens: 2,272ndMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,439thHighest Poor Incomes: 2,549thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,584thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,844thLargest Governments: 3,156thLargest Black Market: 3,540thMost Cultured: 3,653rdMost Efficient Economies: 3,696thMost Advanced Public Education: 3,758thMost Developed: 4,063rdHighest Economic Output: 4,236thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 4,893rdMost Scientifically Advanced: 5,156thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,120thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 6,394thLargest Welfare Programs: 7,140thHighest Average Incomes: 7,403rdMost Beautiful Environments: 7,751stSmartest Citizens: 8,152ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 9,024thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 10,005thTop
Most Influential: 11,498thLargest Populations: 11,688thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 12,375thMost Secular: 12,445thLargest Agricultural Sector: 16,085thBest Weather: 17,179thMost Income Equality: 18,783rd
Most Valuable International Artwork: 34th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 36th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 48th in the regionTop
Most Advanced Public Transport: 55th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 63rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 66th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 67th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 69th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 72nd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 75th in the regionLargest Governments: 87th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 88th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 91st in the regionMost Cultured: 97th in the regionMost Developed: 103rd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 105th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 111th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 118th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 123rd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 127th in the regionLargest Black Market: 128th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 147th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 161st in the regionMost Influential: 183rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 190th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 199th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 200th in the regionLargest Populations: 201st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 208th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 211th in the regionTop
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 296th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 348th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 360th in the regionBest Weather: 378th in the regionMost Secular: 395th in the regionMost Income Equality: 410th in the regionMost Inclusive: 442nd in the regionNudest: 512th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 5 » A Leaf on the Wind, Panormia, Minskiev, Kraljevstvo Rata, and United Libor Lefunkistan.

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