+ Can use a gun
+ Knows how to be safe. Probably
- Literally his life is all guns
- His bed is made of guns
- You need help
-Dumbfounded Seargant of the 25th infantry division
"I don't consider Chuck to be a reliable source of information on account of all the smokeless powder he snorts"
Become the primary arms provider for all sides in a regional civil war and ensure it continues for at least seven months
You have a gun. Your wife has a gun, All three of your children have guns, including the baby. Your dog and cat have guns. The fish swimming in their little bowl have guns. The birds singing on the powerlines? They have guns. There's paintings in your house of people holding guns, and the guns are real. The statue in front of your house has a gun too, and everyone else's house is well armed, down to the basement cellar where Johnny Incel lives, and keeps concealed behind his waifu pillow a katana... and a M134 minigun.
There's a gun behind every blade of grass, they say. Well, no, because every blade of grass has a gun too, and the ants and bugs crawling amongst those blades of grass have guns too. There's guns in the trees, in the bushes, in the tidepools and puddles, every street corner, and every hospital, synagogue, church, school, fire department, insurance agency, wine cellar, bar, swimming pool, strip club and cafe is an arsenal of its' own. Even the very particles of air you breathe are proudly bearing arms.
The only thing I could say is they probably couldn't fistfight worth crap since they have all those guns, but who cares? Guns. Guns everywhere.