by Max Barry

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Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 4,929thLargest Populations: 8,469thMost Advanced Public Transport: 9,895th
The Dem Socialist Republic of
Father Knows Best State
A New Dawning for All
Charles Nellis
Civil Rights
Below Average
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

The Cardwith Islands

Population23.715 billion

LeaderCharles Nellis

AnimalHowler Monkey

The Dem Socialist Republic of The Cardwith Islands is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Charles Nellis with an iron fist, and notable for its state-planned economy, anti-smoking policies, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, cynical population of 23.715 billion Cardwithians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Social Policy. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Noritts. The average income tax rate is 90.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Cardwithian economy, worth a remarkable 1,242 trillion Tupas a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is 52,385 Tupas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

The state conscripts sociopathic orphan girls to train as professional assassins, conversion therapy coupons are a popular present for coming of age ceremonies, the government recently donated a surfboard to an impoverished family in a landlocked region, and disadvantaged neighbourhoods have become no-go areas after sundown. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Cardwith Islands's national animal is the Howler Monkey, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

The Cardwith Islands is ranked 26,603rd in the world and 1st in Wishtonia for Healthiest Citizens, with 9.44 bananas ingested per day.

Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 4,929thLargest Populations: 8,469thMost Advanced Public Transport: 9,895thHighest Average Tax Rates: 10,479thTop
Largest Welfare Programs: 18,511thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 19,729thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 20,430thHighest Economic Output: 20,620thMost Influential: 21,551stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 23,376thLargest Governments: 24,571stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 24,954thBest Weather: 25,386thMost Compassionate Citizens: 26,445thHealthiest Citizens: 26,603rdMost Advanced Defense Forces: 26,884th

National Happenings

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