The Holy Matriarchy of The Blessed and Holy Land is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by the High Priestess with an iron fist, and renowned for its teetotalling pirates, unlimited-speed roads, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 21.395 billion Holylanders are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The minute, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Goddess' Retreat. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Holylandian economy, worth a remarkable 6,574 trillion prayer beads a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is an amazing 307,308 prayer beads, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,878,301 per year while the poor average 2,765, a ratio of 1,040 to 1.

Paralegals spend all day Hewlett-Packing attorneys' law briefs, police and sick people alike fear the Day of Rest as all institutions are forced to shut down, teddy bear James Dean (aka "the Rebel Without the Claws") helps convince kids that candy cigarettes are cool, and the end of autumn is celebrated with a bonfire of designer bags. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. The Blessed and Holy Land's national animal is the cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Goddess Worship.

The Blessed and Holy Land is ranked 69^th in the world and 2^nd in The East Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring 727.23 on the Scary Big Number Scale.